|Posted by an ajian kid at March 1, 2010
I'm a Chinese American 18 years old high school senior,I was born back in china, and now after some shithole decision my parents made I'm stuck here with my abusive mother with her financial problems....yea shes in debt, and worst of all, it's because of me coming here(she blame of course me, but I never decided to come here, she did), and she can never get over this thus I end up miserable everyday with a scarred body and a scarred mind, she calls me stupid and a liar, which were both false, I'm an straight A student and never really lies, sometime I wish I could clearify things, but when i did she'll punish me by saying I'm psychologically unstable, no wnder my stepdad is trying to leave her. yea, my famly's divorced for 17 years, my father remained in china and my mother here, and both of them got remarried, so I have 2 dad and two moms, and worst of all, they're all breaking up again, now I'll have 8 parents, fml.the breaking up is the easy part, but that they empty all their angers on me, blaming me to be the devil that caused all bad things, and tell everyone that, I tried to maintain my reputation as the ideal student(I had been almost-captain for football team and the class president in different period of times my time in highschool as well as maintaained a straight A grade, 4.0GPA and 2300 SAT. and I cared a hell alot about my reputation), but their stupidity always broke that up and I ends up as the laughing stock because of my stupid family, sometime I just wish all of them die!
|Posted by anonymous at February 28, 2010
sorry if i wrote wrong word in english bcoz my english language is poor...
i love one girl from about one n half year and i proposed her one month ago and she agreed and also love me and we both want to marry each other.
after that i told all this thing to my father to get permission to marry her.
but my father don't agree with this relationship and he told me i have to marry with the girl who decided by my father.
than i told all the story to my girlfriend and she cried a lot.
now i want to suicide.......bcoz this happened second time in my life and now i hate all these thing revolved around me.
MY WORLD IS OVER ONE MORE TIME.....
FUCK U LIFE!!!!!
|Posted by Ed at February 28, 2010
Wasted 10 years fighting for a green card so I could stay and care for my son, lived in fear all those years thinking things could turn for the worse and lose my son, not being able to see my family all those years was hell. After 10 years of fighting was finally able to get my green card and thought life was going to be better, but was I wrong my own son made it a living hell using drugs,drinking going to jail and the latest getting together with a stripper and getting her pregnant and the fighting the abuse and the ugliness that accompanies people nowadays made it even worse, then the expense and fighting for the custody of my grand baby whom I more than adore. I have a very physically demanding job which I have done for 21 years and that has taken a toll on my body my hips are gone I never done drugs, don't drink or smoke because I thought that if I respected my body it would take care of me....and man was I wrong I walk like a 90 year old man and the latest I am developing problems with my elbows..cant stop working because years of supporting my parents and 3 brothers have also taken a toll on my finances....and last year sometime in June was thinking about ending my own life..even planned how to but the strength of the love that I feel for my grand baby prevented me from doing it..Im even feel ashamed to publish this sitting here alone at 2:35 am in front of my computer...but writing about it somehow helps
|Posted by Appreciative at February 28, 2010
Stop. Everyone needs to STOP. Life is life, there will be times when you're going through HELL, and what can you do? You walk right through it until you see the sun shine. I dont want to hear it anymore! Life doesnt suck, its a great opportunity for doing things we always imagined was impossible. If you cant pay your bills, feel isolated, lonely..etc, remember that life goes on. Things can and will always change for the better, you just have to get through it. Everyone has problems, youre never alone. No one is ever alone, you have people surrounding you every single day. If you hate your life, then get up RIGHT now and make a change. Its never too late. Never give up.
|Posted by daydreamer at February 28, 2010
I'm not having fun anymore
I used to devour life
outta bed early
wouldn't miss a thing
stay at home mom
3 reasons for living
miss my kids
met someone at work
had an affair
left my husband
boyfriend is a jerk
wrestle with my conscience
i miss everything
drag myself out of bed
life devours me
|Posted by anonymous at February 27, 2010
I am sure that the country one has born in, affects his/her future prospects, philosophy in life, how she/he takes life. The place where i live is called Estonia. Every day i have to struggle with bad weather(that doesnt suit my personalty), depressed and carping people who are so in details, insist on how correct you are- there is always right and wrong and only one colour- gray. My father has left me, but i think i am doing better. Its because of the age, i turned 17 now and my moods are more stabil. I even can see the meaning of life now, although i have been through hard times which were not my fault, caused by the circumstances. I know i will change my country, i will finish high school somewhere else, i will start a new life(because this here affects me too badly, i dont even smile anymore), and this hopefully happens this year. At this age i feel like anything is possible in life, why not to try if im not pleased, i have to take a risk.
|Posted by Allu at February 27, 2010
I am a perfectly normal person exept for the fact that, i am a pedophile.
im 23 yo. I fall in love with little boys. i dont go out in a trenchcoat and rape them like they say on the movies or tv series, thats just crap. its just that the good people like myself are just never known of because we're in disguise, and its the stupid and evil motherfuckers who always get caught doing harm to children. if you think otherwise, go fuck yourself.
I fell in love with a boy aged 11 and he knows i love him, but he of course only loves me as a friend. He will grow, get a hundred girlfriends, pick one to get married with her, have kids and forget about me.
Translate that to your own situation if you like.
I am a person who shouldn't love a child that way and i i cant ever be loved that way from a child. Destination: solitude.
i want to kill myself because i dont want to ever fall in love with anyone ever because it rips my heart out and i am a very lonely person, i need people to be happy. i have talents, gifts and blessings, but they all mean nothing to me because i can't ever be loved. i love that boy so much i wish i was a beautiful little girl so he could love me. fuck life. feel free to insult me so i get more depressed and finally kill myself.
|Posted by anonymous at February 26, 2010
My parents were sitting around with friends one hot summer night. One of them was a heavy set woman, who's name forgets me right now. I was sitting next to her, when all of a sudden my Uncle and Brother called for me to come look at a June Bug who had flown up onto our wall. I stood up, quickly, and my Femur Bone - the biggest in the human body - snapped in half. I was three. That's probably the earliest memory I have. Shear, unspeakable pain. I would go onto to have seven more (waiting for number 8 which is due anytime now). My first day at kindergarten, I remember balling my eyes out. Clinging to my mother as the teacher tried to pull me away. Into the abyss I would come soon to hate with all my heart and soul: School. That same year my grandfather died from complications of smoking and drinking. I remember seeing his casket. "This is how it ends, I suppose." At the age of 12, right before entering High School, my father decided he didn't want to be with my mother anymore - after 19 years of marriage. The impending divorce took my mom, my brother and I to my Grandmother's House, who had just passed away. My mom started seeing a guy who was 20 years her younger. He took care of us for a while. School never got better for me. I was an angry, stuck up, punk ass little coward who didn't know how to control emotions or thoughts. I never went to dances, date any girls, go to any football games (maybe 2 or 3 total) never joined sports, and, ultimately, drop out. At the age of...
|Posted by anonymous at February 26, 2010
I wrote this a few months ago. I'm a person who lost her believe in happiness...
It sounds corny but its true.
I want u ppl to tell me if I'm wrong or right?
After so many years waste of time looking for happiness, now…
Now I see… it doesn’t exist… all these people make them self believe that there is such thing as happiness… they look for it their whole life…
Just a waste of time till death… and people call the waste of time “life”…
It doesn’t make any sense… just think how silly it looks like when you’re “laughing”…
A meaningless process…
But this waste of time is actually good for people… now they make them self’s do something… to stop sitting and saying some shit like me that is obviously true…
People run and run and run… everyday 6 in the morning, until some time in the evening… or night…
They work for money, they think money can make them happy, and a job would give them money and stop them from getting bored…
But no matter how much the person works the family and the person himself always wants more, so they keep working hopping for more and more money, but even when they get the money they want, they want more or there’s always a problem, that still doesn’t make them get the happiness they thought there was in money…
This lie that makes people run around themselves all their life long is just like how they think
Job= money= happiness
Its just like a plant root… a lie grows into a bigger lie…
See how silly it sounds just like a laugh…
Day by day… I wonder… why people believe in these things… why I believe in these things…
u think im wrong/right? why?
|Posted by Wrench at February 26, 2010
I grew up in a middle class conservative religous home going to bible school till i was 18, i believed everything i was taught about god and the biblle hook line and sinker, To make a long story short, i got married after high school to a girl who told me she believed as i did when we talked heart to heart. She had my child and then another child, we were married 14 years, only to have it end finding out our 2nd child was in fact someone elses not mine, she had slept with my own brother, and the neighbor and some of my so called friends////then to top it off and make it worse, she said i was the fault, because i was angry and grabbed her by the collar when i found all this out. She took me to court for abuse, it was thrown out, but she left with the neighbor she had been screwing for 8 years and i was the abusive ex husband( what a fucking lie domestic abuse is) I put her through college and she now makes 6 fiqures, while i struggle after paying child support for years. Well, i no longer believe the lies in the bible, but i am too old to start over, so now i live a lonely life sucks life...DEATH WILL SET ME FREE///Why do some people have all the breaks while those of us on here get f----ed
|Posted by anonymous at February 25, 2010
I left college at the beginning of January to work more hours just to survive. I did'nt want to but I looked on the bright side and decided to find a new job that would give me experience, possibly a future. Well it's frustrating finding a decent trainee position for something that can lead up to something amazing. I've been looking on all the jobsites i know off but most if not all require previous experience/training. In todays economic climate there are too many applicants to few jobs available nothing with prospects for new starters. Now i'm stuck in a rut and wish i could of stayed at college. I've looked for suitable jobs in the armed forces that can lead to the same/very similar careers in civilian life without luck. It seems that no company wants anybody that hasn't got a professional qualification i.e degree. It really is stressful and it sucks I can't find anything even with potential without a degree/experience. How do people get that specific experience if so little companys offer trainee opportunities? My next step would be to study part time and get a degree while working a dead end job even though i would prefer to work my way up in a good company. I feel as though i have everything necessary but i'm being held back. If i got a degree, maybe it would change but i would be stuck in a dead end job for awhile. It proberly sounds stupid but it has really frustrated me like when you want something really bad but you cannot get it. I could also go in depth in other areas like love life,family,health etc which is also bad but this at the moment has pissed me off the most.
|Posted by no body at February 25, 2010
I am 30 with three children (8,7,&4) and a husband of 10 years. Life can not let us get ahead in any aspect. Both of us work out of the home and I go to school online while watching the kids at home. So the home life I cant complain about. It just seems that the bills all come at once. We recently moved back home to the midwest and could not get jobs for almost 6 months. Bills were adding up and no money coming in, sucks. Finally my husband lands a good job. I get a part time job serving at a crappy restaurant. My sister kicked us out onto the streets shortly after Christmas, even though we were paying our share of the rent and bills. I supplied all food into the house thru my food stamps. So there we are middle of winter no place to live. I finally found an apt we can afford for super cheap and it actually met all requirements for us. We could see the light at the end of the tunnel...things looked good. Then BOOM hours get cut at both jobs. Barely able to afford anything once again. We can feed ourselves with food stamps, but cant provide anything else. That only lasted about 2 weeks of little money coming in, we had used all of our savings again to try to keep caught up on bills. Seeing the light again; not for long. Our only vechile breaks down. Another time in our lives we have to barrow money to stay afloat. So 500 dollars later we are driving again. Working extra hours to get the extra money doing good again. BOOM!! All of our bill collectors are calling and needing...
|Posted by anonymous at February 25, 2010
im 17 years old... and I live in Brazil... a shitty place 2 live
my dad died when I was 11... since then we(my mom, sister and me) are drowning in bills, debts of all types.
There are months we don't even have food... so I had to sell all my cds, my vcr, my dvd player, my ps2(that was a gift) just 2 eat something.
I finished highschool last year but I fucked up on the exam to enter public college(I don't have money to pay 4 a private college)
I want 2 major in in engineering or physics but I don't have the money 2 pay for school this year... I wanna study hard to leave this hole someday
but nobody seems to understand that...
Brazil's a dangerous place... A stray bullet could hit u every day...
it's a really violent country.
I'm just tired of this life... it's so fucked up
What's life all about? Tell me... please
|Posted by paralui at February 24, 2010
this life is crap as I have this fuckin family and i can't just discovery who i'am and I wish I could just go into a coma and never wake up but in a dream!!...
|Posted by No one at February 24, 2010
im 16 years old
have had no one love me but a brother who lives 3000 miles away
i dont need to say anything else
|Posted by anonymous at February 24, 2010
well.. i dunno what to say really, after reading a lot of these entries i realize that my life doesn't really suck that much but i just sorta want to get this off my chest i guess.
so well life for me as a kid was pretty average, my parents weren't that great, my dad didn't take care of me at all until i was 13, my mum was always left to take care of me alone and because of that she was always stressed and pretty pissed off most of the time, don't get me wrong, i love her but sometimes... yea..
anyway, when i was about 9, my parents got divorced, they decided they didn't like each other at all. My mum got re-married to a fag of a step-dad who physically and emotionally abused my mum and i, he even threated to beat me on my birthday. Around that time, i was sexually abused which is still a haunting memory to this day, my mum and him would always fight.
Now that im 15, life still isn't that great but im still grateful for everyday, i have medication for my depression, i'm not a virgin -it was my best friend and now things between us are just sorta ughh- i cut myself a lot and when i come to school my 'friends' call me an emo and now, i've lost my other best friend because he got a girlfriend and apparently doesn't have time to be my friend anymore and being a guy at my school pretty much means you can't really talk to anyone about how depressed you are.
Life blows but i'm glad that it gets better :)
|Posted by anonymous at February 24, 2010
WE R A FAM OF 4 I AM 28 MY WIFE TARA IS 29 WE HAVE A 8 YEAR OLD DAUGHTER AND A 4 YEAR OLD SON AND A DOG. I WORK MY ASS OFF AND MY WIFE TAKES CARE OF THE 3 KIDS AND THE HOUSE AND ME. WE HAVE LIVED AT OUR HOUSE FOR THE LAST 2 YEARS. I JUST GAVE MY LAND LORD $3500 AND A FEW DAYS LATER HE LEAVES A LETTER TAPED TO MY DOOR SAYING WE HAVE TO MOVE OUT! HE WONTS TO SELL THE HOUSE AND DOES NOT WONT ANY BODY TO BE LIVING IN IT WHILE HE DOES SO. WE HAVE BEEN LOOKING FOR A NEW HOUSE FOR THE LAST THREE WEEKS AND ARE HAVEING NO LUCK ITS ITHER THE HOUSES R TO SMALL FOR USE OR THEY DONT WONT OUR DOG OR JUST TWO MUCH FUCKING MONEY. WITH ALL THAT AT THE SAME TIME WITH ALL OF THIS WEATHER WE HAVE HAD I HAVE NOT WORKED IN A MOUNTH AND NOW THEY SAY WE R GETTING HIT WITH MORE SNOW. O YA DID I TELL YOU I AM A ROOFER WITH MY OWN VERRY SMALL CO. OUR TIME LINE IS RUNNING OUT BEFOR WE HAVE TO MOVE AND WITH ME NOT ABLE TO WORK WE HAVE NO MONEY. THIS MAY NOT SOUND SO BAD BUT THIS IS HOW OUR LIVES HAVE BEEN FOR THE LAST 10 YEARS. ONCE WE FEEL LIKE EVERY THING IS OK AND WE CAN BREATH MY FAMLEY GETS KICKED IN THE FACE. WE R THE TYPE OF PEOPLE THAT WILL DO ANY THING FOR ANY BODY. BUT SHIT ROLLES DOWN HILL AND WE ARE AT THE BOTTOME OF THAT HILL. MY WIFE AND I HAVE NO FAM TO ASK FOR HELP. I COME FROM A FUCKED UP CHILED HOOD THAT DOES NOT NEAD TO BE DESCUSED. MY WIFES FAM WAS GOOD UNTILL HER MOTHER FUCKED HER FATHER AND DEVORCED HIM AND THE BOLTH LOST EVERY THING THAT HER DAD WORKED FOR AND NOW HE STRUGGLES TO TAKE CARE OF HIM SELF AND HER MOM IS USLESS. I AM ONE WHO BLEVES TO MAKE THE BEST OF THINGS BUT WHEN YOU GET KICKED DOWN EVERY TIME YOU R ALMOST OUT OF THE HOLE OR SEE THE LIGHT AT THE END OF THE TUNNLE YOU GET KICKED BACK DOWN OR THE ELECTRICK CO TURNS OFF THE LIGHTS. SO WHAT R WE TO DO. LIFE DOES SUCK DONT IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!11
|Posted by sueb at February 23, 2010
What really sucks about life is that we have to pay the price for the wrong of others. Like Eve, I could really try to kick her ass for eating that damn apple, but what good would it do me? Someone else would have come along and taken that first bite and I still wouldn't have a choice as to how I wanna live which has always been the point of being free. Instead, I put up with a world that is basically screwing everyone, we're screwing ourselves. Hell, my husband is out of work now on medical with seizures getting only half his income compared to what we're used to... while at the same time, I'm laid off for two months having been denied unemployment due to lack of weekly wages, the weekly wage of $210 which is crazy. Who made up that law, someone who's job is secure, can get unemployment no questions asked, sick days and what have you? Yeah, I also have a serious medical condition that is crippling without meds and winter is the worst, I'm stiff and sore, always in pain, run down, can't think right, can't function right and although I've worked in this country all of my life, I'm fifty, paid my dues and now I'm denied disability and I have to keep trying to work like this. It's damn hard... but why does it take them so long when you do get approved to get your shit going so you can start getting some money. What is up with that? I'd like to know how people are supposed to live without any money coming in at all. What are we supposed to do about our car payments, places to live, insurances for everything. Not to mention, we're always at war. Why can't we just share the fucken shit the earth has to offer and let it be that, we've only got one world here, why in the hell would WE want to destroy it? The only place we have to live. Power, control, and greed is what and what can the little people like the few who do care do about it. No, we have to keep fighting, keep striving, so that we can exist here too.
|Posted by anonymous at February 23, 2010
- 23 year old male in a corrupt, depressing, miserable Northeastern state.
- Obese, but not imminent-death obese like I used to be. Thank Atkins.
- Only living family: severely demented grandfather that I have to care for, and an immature, selfish, lazy, alcoholic cunt of a mother.
- Mom divorced Dad when I was 8, because he wasn't fucking her enough. Winds up getting this broke Italian Catholic asshole with three delinquent kids to move in with us. He probably cost our family about $200000 in the 6 years my mom was "in love" with him. He absolutely hated me for not coming out of his dick, and also not being baptized.
- Watched father die at age of 13 from advanced throat cancer.
- Shortly after, rest of father's family turned their backs on me for not attending former stepbrother's wedding with 2 weeks notice. I was across the country, with no money, and they offered no assistance.
- Fell in love 3 times: each time, the girl used me to get to one of my friends. Lose both friend and girl, and get ridiculed for months, even years afterward.
- Had an abusive stepdad (mentioned above) from 8 to 15 who would threaten to have me put away, lie to get my mom on his side. This would usually be over something like the leaves not getting raked every six hours, or the dishes not getting dried to his liking. Right after things hit the fan between him and my mom, Dad promised to get me out of the house. His cancer came back the next week and he died three ...
|Posted by Sophie at February 23, 2010
Life is going to suck for all of us.
It's just a fact. People have taken one glance at me and my life and assumed it was oh so good...
They don't know about everything horrible in my life that I'd rather not talk about...
All my friends have had problems in their lives too, and they all eventually got so much better.
I can only assume that everyone else will get better too then:)
At least we're allowed to hope..and try to change our lives; as much as they suck and we wanna scream and rip off our heads...it can't get worse so it must get better...
To everyone that has posted on this site; I feel bad for each one of you:( ...life is tough...we have to try to find the little good things that make us happy no matter how much everything else sucks.
For me that would be icecream and my girlfriend:)