I am a 21 year old woman from England.
I am writing this because I seriously need to vent, I can't really talk to friends and family about this stuff because they aren't really interested, people love you when you're happy and dissapear when you're sad right?
My whole issues stem from my Dad, I call him Richard now, as Dad doesn't seem like an appropriate title for him.
He is the most spiteful, paranoid, horrible and selfish person I have ever known.
He never bothered with me, only spoke to me when he wanted to slag off other members of my family, and constantly accussed me of trying to speak to him when I wanted presents for Birthday's and Christmas, (fat joke, that lazy twat wouldn't have gotten me anything anyway!) I have gieven him so many chances, hoping he@ll change, then one day I got a message from him telling me that he never wants tos peak to me again, that I was a disgrace and that if i tried to contact him he would have me arressted for harrassment, this all stemmed from a facebook status where I put "Epic Bus driver going so fast he's missed all the stops" to which my friend commented "bus drivers are so miserable", (he used to be one until he was fired for running someone over on purpose and for kidnapping the passangers and driving at top speed through Basingstoke laughing his head off and scaring them all) took offence to her and called her names I would never even write on this page, they are so disgusting, I asked him what he was playing at, talking to her like that over a little comment, and I was told to get away from him and his family, worst thing is, my Nan who practically raised me, has sided with him, and now they don't speak to me, and he isn't joking about reporting me to the police, he's so spiteful he'd do it without hesitation.
My job sucks, it's so boring, people talk to me like shit and constantly ignore me, I could turn up and do a great steaming shit on the desk, no-one would even notice.
My Fiance is a total prick sometimes, he's in the army and seems to have something going on with this well known tart in the army (a clerk) we fight about her all the time, he doesn't lift a finger at home, makes me cough up money for food shopping, whilst he runs up massive bills on his credit cards buying himself Ipods and take-aways, then he snaps if I want to go for a meal or have friends over, as it's too expensive, I am in no debts, have no over-draft or credit card, yet he's happy to make sure I end up paying for more than I should because his monthly bills go up due to his ridiculous spending.
He pisses off for ages at a time with work, tells me he is staying in the same room as the Army sluts, goes out partying with his army friends' and has a go at me if I object on the grounds that when he gets home, he'll have no money for the bills.
He's about to go away for 3 weeks with the army slut on exercise, they'll be in the same room for 3 weeks, all day and night together, whilst I sit at home alone, staring into space.
He made himself lunch for work yesterday, said he was making me one and didn't even bother, didn't tell me he hadn't so I am at work with nothing to eat, the last of my monthly wages are being saved for this weeks food shopping.
He leaves his sleezy 'teen sex' porn on my computer, wanks off in my fucking shower, treats me like shit and calls me a 'bitch', 'nasty bitch', 'boring' and 'petty', he ignores me, doesn't touch me for weeks then is all over me, he's naff in bed, balding and goofy and he's only 24.
I gained weight after a serious injury and he's gotten even worse, I spend my time hiding away terrified everyone is judging me for my imperfections, his friend's are horrible, his mum is a total bitch who thinks she can do what she likes whenever she likes and speak to me like shit in my own home. He eyes women up all the time, even though all his friends and work mates said he has punched above his weight getting with me, he watches crap on tv all night and goes to bed at bloody 9pm every night even weekends, we don't do anything, it's so boring, all I look forward to is our 2weekly trip to blockbusters to rent some new DVD's, the last time he took me out somewhere was to London for our engagement, that was last year now, and he was horrible to me on that day, I very nearly said no, I don't know why I said yes sometimes, love is starting to not be blind anymore, instead it's starting to be replaced with reality.
Each day I wake up hoping something exciting will happen, but it doesn't, I want to be with the love of my life but he has moved in with a woman who looks like a fat mountain goat, who controlls him so much he isn't even allowed to make eye contact with me, I hate her so much, and I hate the fact he chose her over me, what the hell is he smoking? She actually looks like a fat wasp with a bulldogs chin. little pug face.
It's my 22nd Birthday next weekend, my fiance has already told me, he wont be getting me anything, he has to spend all his money on his debts. Happy birthday huh.
I know this all seems trivial, but the little things add up in your head and make everything so much worse.
Sometimes life is good, today, it really fucking sucks. | |
Aneways...I hope things work out for you.
I've put a pin block on all the adult channels, he is just foul.
But thanks for listening, it helped.
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