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Out of the pan and in the fire

Posted by stupid at October 8, 2011
Tags: 2011 October  Relationship

Were do I start, I had been married for six years. Wife not working and I was working 40 to 60 hours a week plus going to college. As you can image i fell for somone in college. She was in a boat like mine a ten year bad marrage. I fell hard. She did lie about her age but that under the water now. I thought i couldn't live with out her so I divorced my wife and married her.(yes, Sex was involved.) Well it's twenty years later and were still married. I have two children from the first marrage who want talk to me.
About 8 years ago I had a second affair this one with a co-worker. I know how i felt about her, I LOVED her and knew I could not and would not stop seeing her it was a deep LOVE but, and didn't want to loose a nother child. (we have one daughter) so I took a new Job out of state to get away. My wife found out 6 months after we moved. I told her half the story. I did not want to hurt her, (yes I know that sounds stupid but it's true.) remember this is how we got toghether in the first place.
Any how My wife says she only have half a heart and will never forgive me. Still married. She's sending email to sister and sister in-law with lies about me drinking and whiskey bottles. She putting ideals in our daugher head about me being a bad person. I drink very little a 12 pack lasts weeks.
My wife is a sick person she teaches and then come home sits in chair and sleeps till time for bed. She reads all night and when i touch her she pulls away.
So it's been 6 months weve been sexual with each other. I know I sound like a jerk and looser but. I have done a lot of stuff for her. As i said early she in the hospital 2 or 3 times a year. doen't like going outside sleeps all the time and no this is not just since the affair. This is why I had one 8 years ago. I
I'm lost with myself. I know iv;e done wrong i've asked to be forgiven. She continues to poingt out how bad I am. does she not remember her affaire with me? Her kids from her first marraige have since move to were we live. One know the whole story I told them were really close and they see first hand how i'm treated and they understand. The other only knows what mom has said. ( Oh, when my wife found out about the affair she call every one in both mine and her family to run me in the dirt.)
She, my wife talks about divorceing me but not while we have a child in school.
I'm at my end not know what to do. She pay more attention to, the kids, {30,25,17} the dogs and other animals, then she does to me.


Similar Entries:
Cold as a Warm Fire December 11, 2011
SICK & TIRED of being SICK & TIRED January 18, 2011
My freind died in a fire March 22, 2011
Bulid me up just to bring me back to hell. February 10, 2012
Damn August 1, 2011

New Comment

By anonymous at 26,Nov,11 20:17

Here's some tough love. Some people are not meant to be married and make that commitment. If you want freedom to move on to another person at any time, don't be married. This time get divorced and simply keep yourself free. Have long term relationships but don't marry.

By anonymous at 27,Nov,11 14:12

You're a cheating asshole. You deserve any amount of garbage that's heaped on you. Life in the grown-up world is tough on someone who has the morals and self control of a child. Grow up and deal with your decisions.

New Comment