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My shitty life

Posted by Miserable in MA at December 28, 2009
Tags: Abuse  Appearance  December 2009  Family  Health

Im 30 years old. My father was an alcoholic and my mother was a huge bitch. She hired some whore babysitter who locked me in the bedroom so she could molest my brother. Or so he tells me because I blocked it out, he then molested me and never explained or talked about the situation later in life. I doubt hes any better. hes the sucessfull one, ironically. After dad left. I had to babysit my little sister and brother who are like 12 years younger than me, so they were babies, litterally. We lived in a slum, my mom was working 3-11 no parents kids dragged my baby brother and sister on the ground cuz they were the only white people, had rocks thrown at outr windows lead poisioned wated and roaches and rats no hot water or heat, no nice clothes. i didnt get paid or even appreciated.
My mom spent her life putting me down trying to hit me, telling me im going to hell. i broke down couldnt take all the neighbors picks on the kids and no parents, kids would fuck things up and balime it on my brother. now my brother is always getting fucking beat up on but he fights back so hes going to prison, for spraying mace in a guys face who attacked him cuz mace isnt legal in my state. Yes I fucking know. Its not fair.
At fucking all. Kids in the upperclass can get away with driving without paying thier insurance my bro was working at tacobell and not getting jack. he couldnt afford rent and auto insurance. he went to jail for it, not a ticket.
some kid threw his dog in the trash, he fought him and it was him who went to jail not the kid who tried to kill a puppy by throwing it away live in a dumpster when it was in his care.
I HAVE FUCKING SOCIAL ANXIETY AND IT MAKES ME TALK OUTLOAD, I say what people expect the worse thing possible, thats what they want right. Im the queen of self sabotage.
FURTHER I wasnt allowed to have the light on at night so i read in the dark then I needed glasses, since i got glasses my vision has deteriorated cuz thats what glasses do, they fuck up your eyes. YAY.
Now I cant even see.
I went to an ortodontist to fix the spaces on my top teeth I should have gotten invisaline but he was like no no no well just bring the first six together with partial braces and noone will ever see the spaces on the side BULLSHIT IT LOOKS HORRIBLE.
So now my teeth still suck. I liked them better BEFORE.
Now onto my nose or shall i say BEAK. Its pointy up turned and freaking huge.
Ive never found love or had tantric orgasmic fucking sex.
Oh I have small tits.
Cuz I STARVED during my adolesence. YEAH LITTERALLY STARVED, the only thing that kept me alive was tubs of government peanutbutter and stuff.
Im too old tired, and I care about nothing I have no drive to do anything it all seems way fucking out of reach and why should I fucking bother???????????????????

I just want to be in ill health and die "accidentally" like Brittany Murphey.


Similar Entries:
untitled story December 30, 2011
Mess of a Life May 28, 2012
Loneliness May 28, 2012
Life is so shitty I f*cked up bad. September 22, 2009
My life suck hardcore October 29, 2011

New Comment

By maori nz at 08,Jan,10 00:23

just want to say i fell for you my sister!!!and your bro's,i wish i could do something to help you you's,umm reading the shit about what happen to your bro's that sad it really is,make me want to come over thea and get thows cunt's,assholes,they must be just like thea mum's and dad's realcunt's!!!!!!!,Sister Godbless you in all your day,keep looking up its to dark and deep to be looking down,stay harty my sister stay harty!!!!!!!!.
By anonymous at 16,Sep,10 06:14

you people don't help at all. You're just to put on a smile and ignore your shitty life. Of course you can say that because you're probably a priverliged self-righteous toser. Fuck off.

By anonymous at 08,Jan,10 02:15

sorry, i'll try to make difference in this world

By anonymous at 08,Mar,10 05:37

1 word...BAIL outta your life..find a i dunnoe a quiet place 2 die..thats what my dream is. gtfo from my life and die in a peaceful..meadow? hahas yeah meadow is nice..maybe a bit snow..winter night..yeah i like to die on a place like that. dont bother my corpse cuz id like it to rot n dwell at that place im dead.

By anonymous at 23,Oct,10 13:16

Jesus Christ, This is heartwrenching. If I was in your position it seems like there is no way out.

Write a book about your life, make millions
By anonymous at 11,Feb,12 16:44

Totally. Then you'd be rich and have a better life. :)

By anonymous at 27,May,11 21:42

truth life really is supposed to be shitty dont you realize, your in hell. people are hell. the lonewolf i like my own company you fucking assholes

By anonymous at 27,May,11 21:44

kiss my ass warmongers sex and drug addicts you are in hell theres no getting out tell you die bitch.

By anonymous at 26,Jun,11 02:06

Fuck life I live in a shit hole with my husband and son. I cannot get a decedent job so we live with my in-laws btw I'm 43! Ya life sucks don't believe in anything anymore it is a fucking! big let down. I applied to over 100 jobs in the last 3 yrs nothing! Pray light candles do cleansing for what life is the biggest let down and then you die.
By anonymous at 28,Dec,11 19:12

at least u have a kid, got cancer when i was 29 and i'll never have kids, we're broke, live in a crap house.

By anonymous at 20,Oct,11 14:05

hey dont get yourself down because if you listne to others all your life, your not you, but if you belive in youself then you can do , dont let no one get you down!!!!!!
hope for the best

By anonymous at 03,Jan,12 15:51

want a shit fucking life pal you can have mine

By anonymous at 03,Jan,12 15:53

when i die ill have a smile on my face fuck you all people say i love you, they are full of bollox, they will never know what they had till its gone

By at 14,Apr,12 00:46

life gets better so dont give up stay possitive im here to talk if u need someone to talk to

By anonymous at 01,Aug,12 19:30

I am crying as I read your story, I too know how shit life can be as I have a shit in my life too. I'm sorry for all you have been through and I wish I could help you. Yours is the first blog that I have actually read and connected with. I hope you will find the life you want and deserve. I saw one post that said you should write a book. That is what I think you should do too!! If you were close by (I live in toronto)I think we would be friends my sister.. fuck everyone, you have real people out here that are thinking of ya! You will overcome.. I know you will! Peace!

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