Im in 9th grade. I feel i should be enjoying myself and all but this weird feeling is popping up more and more. I keep feeling more sad and angry. I cant go to sleep at night because I am too busy crying and resenting my past. I know I should look in the future but the stuff I did in the past are the cause for my future. I screwed up in Geometry, so I think my dreams of majoring in science at columbia is tarnished. I really like this girl and she even talks to me ( I do not have much friends who are girls) I dont think she likes me though, she is just too nice. I feel I am getting more dumb as well, I am barely sticking in there in school and put in twice the effort. Everyone looks so happy around me but it just makes me feel worse. All of the crap Im babbling about may sound petty, but if you really know how depressed I always felt through my entire life for no reason, you should understand that it feels ten times worse when there are actually situations to be depressed about. I want to live like an ordinary kid and feel happy but I always come out short and feel more depressed. Is this highshcool I am experiencing. If you couldnt guess by now I am one of those shy kids in public, loud around my firends ( and when I try to impress this girl I like). I would call my self a nerd, but I have decent not the best grades. THis is the first time I spoke my feelings so I am sorry if it is hard to understand | |
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things get better, you'll only get stronger
listen to Lullaby by nickleback, helped me a lot, or keep a journal to let it all ou
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