I believe most of these posts are from the u.s I'm in the UK don't take this the wrong way i love the u.s I'm half American I'm now 20 years old and life overall seems completely pointless I'm constantly paranoid of other people I'm horrified of talking to any one as I can't trust myself not to lie the hid my miserable life when spoken to, my throat chokes up and I never or barely manage to force a stutered answer. I feel like I'm on drugs all the time when I've never even seen or use any drugs. I've tried suicide 3 times now and I can't bring myself to try again. I have no job and never had one before I've been offered one before but my parents stopped me before my first work day I have no self esteem, confidence, people skills, social life, physical strength, I suffer from depression, asthma and mental breakdown I have no finances though I'm told by my parents when they have a go at me I have around £3000 or more yet I've seen no proof of this. I've no one to talk to I'm mental outstarted and disrespect by my siblings and at one point I snapped under pressure nearly beating my 14 yearly sister who have a bitchy attitude towards me. when I was a child I was retarded and ignorant of every thing around me and I fully aggre that ignorance is bliss i would gladly go back to my childhood at least I was happy then now this seems like a dream from long ago god I so badly wish I was making this shit up but in a nut shell my life is FUCKED UP what can I do? I've tried reading countless books on confidence and improving life and it doesn't help the only thing I ever seem to nowadays is compare my life to everyone else. | |
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