| | Posted by steelpenguin at June 23, 2010 |
I’m feeling very alone right now and no I’m not depressed. Just a little confused and lost. I’ll put this into “bullet points” to make this situation easy to get.
1. I have a college degree. BA in Business Administration from Youngstown State Class 2003
2. My last job was as a Market Compliance Manager for Wachovia Securities.
3. Due to the Financial crisis our firm merged with two others and I lost my job in Oct of 2009. They gave me a severance package and sent me on my way.
4. I was never happy doing office work anyway and I’ve always been very mechanical. I worked as a machinist thru out college and I loved it. The pay was not that great but I did enjoy it. Plus in mid 2008 I applied for a spot in a local steel mill. They had me in and tested me. I passed and I interviewed. Unfortunately they had a big shut down so they did not hire anyone at that time.
5. That local Steel mill has a bunch of guys retiring this year and they are once again hiring. Well I applied and so did a friend of mine which is a carpenter. They called him and hired him. I did not get a call. I eventually got an email from HR saying that they are not interested in bringing me in for a interview!
6. They only hired 6 people and they still have 18 spots open. They can’t get anyone else to pass the written test and or drug test! This has been going on for 4 months! I know this because I have a couple more friends that work there. This is driving me insane because I have machin... |
| | Posted by Mr unconfident at June 23, 2010 |
Okay, to start off, my life is not bad as some of these stories but i need to get this stuff off my chest.
Right, so i haven't done to badly for myself, when i wanted to buy something, i find the means to get the object i desire( motorbike,Flat,Clothes)-no problem.
My problem is that i so pathetically shy and unsociable, its really depressing, i can't talk to people when i'm sober which is annoying seems im a nice,genuine if slightly clumsy guy . i have to be drunk which then results in me making an ass of myself which in turn makes me feel self-conscience about my appearance making me more shy.The only time my confidence is good and im happy with myself is when i do cocaine but that in way means when im sober i would be like " i would talk to that bird,if i had some cocaine", a vicious cycle, plus cocaine habits if i recall are quite expensive and i' not a rich boy.
So, if you hadn't guessed already i am a VIRGIN at 21. WTF, i check on google and there are post saying "it's okay to be a virgin" "wait for your first time" what an absolute load of bullshit, have you ever worked in a kitchen or out with a group of lads and after 5 pints everyone starts talking about pussy, you have to sit there faking laughs and nodding your head like you actually know what these lads are talking about. FUCK.
My confidence is that bad that have been travelling australia now, and in a place in Cairns, there is a bar called the Woolshed- in the guide book for the country ... |
| | Posted by Carol at June 22, 2010 |
One day I decided to walk to work becuase it was a warm day but not hot. Imad eto work with no problems. At 6 I was walking home when a van pulled up next to me and two men pulled me in. There three men in the van one was driving. They gagged and bindfolded me. I felt my shoes being pulled off. then heard the sound of my dress slip bra stockings and panties being ripped off. The van stopped and I as raped by all three men. I was still blindolfolded and gagged the threw out of the van with my shoes only. After they I put on myshoes and a woman saw me and took the hospital. the police let me keep my shoes. they where my clothes were i told the men that raped still have and they ripped them off me. Ws gicen some scrubs and the police took me home. They never cuaght the men that raped and leftme in my shoes. I feeel shame violated Humilated and embaressment. It is the lowest I have felt. I want tose men cuaght before another poor girl is attacked. |
| | Posted by worthless at June 22, 2010 |
Well I was born to alcoholics. My mother 'raised' me by pushing me off on my brothers and sisters. Growing up I had no clue about things normal kids learn growing up with caring parents. I got pregnant at 16, had a baby at 17. The father didn’t want anything to do with him. I had hope then finished High School worked crappy jobs to keep my child in clothes and food. My favorite brother died in a house fire. Was so depressed I guess I didn't notice some red flags on the next guy i dated. He had a good job, spent time with his son, yet wouldn't introduce me to his friends. We hooked up, my mother died, he moved in. Then he'd disappear for days at a time come home broke. I was so naive I didn't realize what was going on. We had 3 kids with in 4 years. Crack took over all his time and money. I was left to raise 4 children on my own. Worked full time at a job I hated. I couldn't take it anymore so I quit and went back to school. Going to school while raising children is no picnic. Especially while working part time to keep bills paid. A year and a half in my sister commits suicide. This made me more depressed then normal. Just over a year later my brother committed suicide. I flunk that semester of school and know that my chance at an education is at an end. This basically signs my life away to live in poverty. My nephew died this last spring. I'm wondering how I'm to spend another day on this earth. I’m having major health issues. It just keeps getting better today my son was let go from his job so any help with bills I was getting is gone. I'm going to lose my house, my kids and I don’t think I’ll live to see 2011. |
| | Posted by Zach at June 22, 2010 |
9 months ago, when I was much more naive, I let a guy who worked in the kitchen at the bar I worked in crash on my couch because he didnt have a place for a weekend, which turned into 3 months, he invited people in, broke stuff, and I finally got the nerve to kick him out. However, there were a couple other homeless people I met because of him, and I let them crash at my place because they seemed reasonable. One of them brought a girl who slept on the floor. In the end I got the nerve to kick them all out, 4 months ago, and thought it was the end of a dark period of my life. I was wrong, the police came to speak to me last week for reasons I was oblivious to, and ended up arresting, and charging me, with sexual assault of a girl whose I did not even know. It turns out, that girl my friend brought to my place and I kicked out has a little sob story about being visciously attacked in her sleep, and even identifys me by name. She drew a picture of what my house looked like and everything. Now I got lucky, it turns out this isnt the first time she was caught lying about this, but I say this. Do not feel sorry for them, because the street walkers are there for a reason. |
| | Posted by mary at June 22, 2010 |
A boy took me to prom and we had a wonderful time. when time to go he told to get int and he drove a sucluded location and tokk off my shoes and zipped my dreess and pulled it off the he took my slip strpless bra and apntyhose. I was in nothing but my underwear. He put my clothes in a bag and blidfolded and drove around for long time I was clod becuase I was in my underwear. he stopped the van again took off my underwear and raped my for long time. He told to put my underwear on and he threw out of the van an left in my underwear I found my clothes he have been throwing my clothes out he window as he drove away. i put in thec lothes as I found them and went ot he hospital myself and the police took all my clothes. Tey did rape kit and he was cuaght two days later. The found thing on me and my clothes and in his van. I got my clothes after thtrial he got serval years for rape akidnapping and false impriionment. Why did this haapen to me? I did not do anything to desrve what I went through. If some that doesn't suck then waht does? |
| | Posted by Must escape! at June 21, 2010 |
My life was good until the year of 2004. Then everything started to change.
I was raped. But never told anyone about it. Me and my family were kicked out of our house because we couldnt pay the rent. We were homeless for 6 months! I get abused almost everyday.
My boyfriend recently broke up with me for my best friend! FML. I want to die sometimes, i cry myself to sleep wishing that someday, somewhere, someone will rescue me from my miserable lonley life. I remember wanting to die so bad I randomly started swallowing a bunch of medicine but my brother stopped me. All of my friends are pretty much fake. Sometimes I wonder if God is real. |
| | Posted by Some_Jerk at June 21, 2010 |
God... where to begin... I'm a 22 year old pathetic excuse of a male with few to no redeeming qualities. I have few friends, and the ones I do have I either rarely see because they don't want to include me in almost anything or are just using me for car rides, money etc. and have nothing in common with me. I am a failure, and I'm not using the term lightly... I'm talking about physically, mentally, and even spiritually as well. I fail at everything... even things I'm intensely interested in; failure. Anything I do from math problems that my peers can do with frightening ease even though they binge drink every night to video games 10 year old kids with downs syndrome can beat... it always ends in failure. I do so poorly in school that I dropped out of college... everyone else seems to be able to succeed in school with no sweat, but the simplest of things I can't even do, and even the things I DO get right, I forget almost all of it once the stress of the test is gone. It's not like these are minor "oopses" everyone has; no, the failure never wears off and I just can't do anything correctly. A lot of people like to laugh, gawk, and make jokes about it behind my back and a lot of others just feel sorry for me. Well FUCK THEM. They can eat shit and die because they have no idea who I am or what I'm going through being human. I'm extremely short and skinny and people mistreat me for this too; at my job, everyone else gets away with slacking off while I have to work d... |
| | Posted by bob at June 21, 2010 |
To start off,
I am a skinny short 18 year old born and raised in Vancouver, Canada...however, looks have to be the least of my problems.
My problems began when my parents divorced before my age could even hit double digits. Before my mom divorced my dad, it was possibly the best time of my life and best time i ever will have had in my life. I had great friends and I lived it the most loving home i couldnt even have created. After the divorce, my mom took cared of me and my sister for the first 2 years after the split and i only saw my dad on weekends. After 2 years, my dad would ask me every now and then if i wanted to move in with him. I declined politely each time with out a reason. Why did i decline? not because i prefered my mom over my dad i just dont think i could stand doing that to my mom who is a fragile person. After the divorce, most of the mutual friends sided with my dad and my mom didnt have many friends, even to this day. So i had to live with rejecting my dad like that over and over for most of my young teenage years. My personality and character changed for the worst as i became a lot more self conscious, stress and shy. Through out highschool, i smoked a lot of pot weekly and now i drink beer daily. I became antisocial and depressed person even though i am known to be a big joker and a happy person amongst everyone that gets to know me. i am a funny person and therefore can put on a good front however, inside i feel dead. I guess you can call me ... |
| | Posted by marley at June 21, 2010 |
my wife and i are separated the problem is i still love her,but i pregnant a woman that inever loved,what will i do,,it is ok to run on the girl that i preggy and back to my wife |
| | Posted by janice at June 20, 2010 |
I am 43 years old, and I live in a van.. the van isnt so bad. it is the fact that I live in a van with 4 dogs, my beautiful husband; and i live in oklahoma... did I mention that it is the middle of summer... my daughter and her husband are in jail.. my 3 beautiful grandbabies are in dhs custody... but living with my son in laws father... i lost my job so I cant get my daughter out of jail.. my husband works 20 hours a day and we still cant make enough money to survive on.... my grandkids ask me all the time when moma is coming home... i have no more answers... i have no more hope... i have no idea what i have done in this life to deserve.. this hell that I am in... did I mention I am a college student to.... life sucks if your lucky you may have a few found moments of happiness then you die |
| | Posted by anonymous at June 19, 2010 |
My heart suddenly begins to hurt a lot at around 12 am. I beg my mom to give me a ride to the hospital. No. I beg my sister for a ride. No. I ask my sister for 15 dollars so I could cab since she makes that much money an hour. But no. I can't get a ride to the hospital. Ok, well fuck you family. I go see what little money I have left from working my ass off for 6 bucks an hour. I take a $20 bill. I call a cab. It's around 1 am. I arrive at the hospital relieved thinking I'll be fine and they'll make the pain go away. WRONG. Apparently since I'm a minor and alone I am not allowed to get treated for anything. So they tell me I have to go to childrens hospital. Oh ok then. Only problem is I spent 16 fucking dollars on a cab getting to a hospital that refuses to help me even though it could be a life threatening. So there I was sitting on the edge of a curb crying because my heart pain was so intense. Eventually I picked my pathetic ass up and dragged it over to childrens hospital which was a half hour fucking walk. I get there and they allow me in. They run some tests, get a couple x Rays and it turns out I have a serious heart condition. I'm not even 18 yet and I'm probably going to die in a few years.
Fuck life and everyone and everything in it. |
| | Posted by anonymous at June 18, 2010 |
At time of writing, I'm 21 and living with parents mostly due to financial reasons, but also because of mental issues (depression, etc). Throughout the majority of my life, I have been subject to various forms of bullying, from typical places such as school and generally out and about, to places you'd least expect like church. From a young age, people would provoke me to the point of lashing out, in which case I would always, bar no occasion, be portrayed as the overall initiator, and the actual bullies would go unpunished. By the time I had finished primary school/kindergarten (don't know the US equivalent), I was pretty much an emotional wreck.
I started secondary/high school with trust issues about my new colleagues. Not even a month into the first year, I was already reduced to suicidal tendencies because bullies from the previous school were already there and recognised me. This would later serve as an excuse for future bullies to make a laughing stock of me throughout the next five years. Also about this time, I had (ironically) became a Christian and, by default, hung around with two other Christians who went to the same church. By the second year, they too had also decided to pick on me, one of them even carried it over to Sunday service (verbally). I drifted from various friend groups from different years throughout the first three years before finding a group who genuinely accepted me for who I was.
Of course, them being the year above, they... |
| | Posted by TZJ at June 18, 2010 |
I was born in China, where the people might be poor in Western perceptions, but certainly not poor in happiness terms. I was loved, cared, looked after and had great spirituality in my life, until China begin opening up.
My official happiness life ended in 1998 when the business life forced my parents to send me to an English learning boarding school, where the Chinese spirituality was minimized. During my time I had unpleasant memories lasting until today dealing with people not from China. I did not understand them and had constant conflicts.
Then comes Australia, another 8 years of life changing pain. My family suffered greatly after coming both financially and mentally. I do not fully understand why they came to Australia, but at least I know pollution in China has gone out of control. We are not talking about air particles, we are talking about toxic materials leaking to underground water and no longer buying food you are sure of.
Australia has little to no spirituality, which my life depends. The people are soulless here, and not caring for others. Being in Australia I tried to integrate to the Australian way of life, but failed miserably. Now I isolate myself completely from Australians, and every time I talk to them I get so upset.
I am doing everything to get out of this country, and have my pre-1998 life again. My parents are suffering greatly and has deteriorated to my sadness. Its permanently hurting when you are forced out... |
| | Posted by nobody at June 17, 2010 |
i feel like this is a self pity story because i know noone cares but here goes. im 40 single 335 lbs havent had a date or been in relationship for over 15 years. i dont have the ability to even begin to talk to a woman anymore well at least when it comes to that and even if i could, im not the type of guy that gets the girl anyway, never was, even at 185lbs. well enough about that, now get this,i have skin tags everywhere, underarms, around my neck, along my butt crack and on my legs where they rub together so it hurts to walk sit or try to do any exercise at all because they burn like hell when inflamed. i have a dead end job that pays less money every year than the year before thanks to our bad economy, but the bills just keep coming. oh yah did i mention that the last girl i had a relationship with was a crackhead and use to steal from me to support her habit and would then beat the sh_t out of me when id say anything about it. i live in a sh_t hole town that way to far from anything to do except sit around and get even fatter. my company issued me business cards with my name on them but for job title it just ,after my name. im not a , im a human being just like everyone else that works here, they all have a title after their name! i can be in a room with 25-30 people i know and nobody even knows im there. i tried eharm for a year and nothing not one date, i only have 11 facebook friends and the only time im not depressed is when im sleeping. so there you have it. 40 years of life all summed up in one short life sucks story!! |
| | Posted by ano at June 17, 2010 |
my life sucks so many times.I am gonna mention the last one.It is the time when I was living my dreams , I was just reinventing myself,I had to quit.I had to quit my dream job.I broke up with my bf(in relationship for past few years) at the same period of time.I have broken down fully.I lost my good friends with whom I used to share with my things.I am alone in the whole sheer world and it is this time when my equation with mom has changed to negative. how do I come out of d situation?? I am tired... |
| | Posted by anonymous at June 17, 2010 |
*READ FIRST* - This got forwarded to me the other day through an old college buddy. I think I know who wrote this, and if he ever sees this I hope he can move on, as cold as that sounds. It's been five years buddy.
I had a pretty decent life up until my freshman year of college. Friends, supportive family, always had something fun going on. Freshman year 2005, I went to a party with a handful of friends from school and wound up hooking up with a way-out-of-my-league girl I'd known from class. We were both drunk, so was everyone. But we were both lucid enough to have a good time. She and I even spent the night together, in the morning we exchanged numbers and everything. I didn't hear back from her again and she ignored my calls; I chalked it up to a one-time deal.
A week later I come back to campus from a funeral and get arrested for rape. I guess since word got out that I had managed to have sex with the queen on the cool girls, this cunt couldn't handle the social ramifications so she went to the cops and told them I'd slipped her something and raped her. Expelled, all my credits were forfeited (so long to $30,000). Did three days in jail waiting for bail money. Wind up going back home to slightly less-supportive family. Did the court thing. Bitch lied through her teeth, and of course had the biggest bulldyke of a lawyer I'd ever seen. She couldn't even keep her bullshit story straight but since "women don't lie about rape", she won. My lawyer got m... |
| | Posted by Fundo at June 17, 2010 |
Ok, am 21 yrs old, frm malawi(dats in africa). It started a r ago wen mx dad went flat broke cz he udnt listen 2 any1 who gave constructive critisim on his business, my mum dsnt work n she tried 2 help him bt he wudnt allow it, he trusted da wrng ppl n they brought da company down, i had 2 drop out of school during my 1st yr of uni n i cud hv bn finishn nxt yr, we lived in a nyc surburb n had 2 muv 2 a ghetto ass area in a house with no electricity, food is nw rationed cz we dnt hv plenty, we have no money at all, cnt even afford a crappy college. Once apon a time my dad had tha money 2 pay 4 xul anywer bt he had so much money he thot he was God bt God showed hm. Everyday i wori abt my future, cnt accept its ova bt i hv 2, the worst hs hapnd n am here in tha dark..if i had electricity i cud switchd on my xbox o computer n i wud drift 2 another world oblivious 2 tha carnage n cnstnt wori, plus the fool of dad went n got a loan n instead of invest, he did God knws wat with it, nw the loans guys r up our ass..jus wnt t go bck 2 xul n get a life bt as of nw it seems am goin nowhere |
| | Posted by anonymous at June 16, 2010 |
I'm 34 married unhappy and at the end of contemplating what to do. What scares me is that all the things that used to make me happy when I felt depressed no longer work for me. I used to smoke weed and do other drugs but even those stopped working. And I am not about to start taking any Big Pharmacuetical pimped cures that do nothing to cure the problem and only lead to lifelong addiction.
Most of my childhood was chaotic. My mother divorced my father when I was nine and then proceeded to move from boyfriend to next husband to next boyfriend every couple of years. So as a result I never got to stay put anywhere fo very long and I think that it has left a lasting negative effect on me. I find it difficult if not impossible get close w/ most anyone.
The only thing that ever seemed to give temporary release other than the drugs was my lifelong obsession/addiction w/ video gaming. But after a lifetime of playing games there is simply no satisfaction anymore. I think I realized some years ago that it's a throuroughly hollow persuit. Akin to living vicariously throught virtual experiences that never really happened by staring at a box for many says and hours.
I don't even feel close with my own wife. Oh sure at first it SEEMED like we were close and right for each other and honestly she is a good person who does seem to care for me. The problem is that as the years go by I care less and less for her and I feel like complete shit because of it. And t... |
| | Posted by sick and tired at June 16, 2010 |
i dont know were to turn any more,i had a good job,made a good living for my wife and myself,no worries,a fella talked me into going to work for him,said he would give good pay all the work i wanted,a year goes by,things are going not to bad,then the work gets less and less,i am living on the edge of broke,then the work picks up and my bills are getting caught up,still behind but getting caught up,then his brother comes home,the first thing buddy does is lay me off,well my old job is gone,jobs are hard to get,i should have stayed where i was working and told buddy to pound sand,i have been job hunting, resumes going out every where,i have been out of work for about a year,i feel as though i let my wife down,i dont talk much any more ,i used to enjoy working in my veg. garden,my heart is not in it any more,i used to go to the woods for walks,my heart is not in it any more,i used to enjoy having our grand kids on the weekends,my heart is not in it any more,i used hold my wife in my arms,and tell her that i love her,i still love her very much ,but my heart is not in it any more,LIFE SUCKS,i just want to turn time back,but you and i know that cant be done,i am sick and tired of my heart not being in it any more and getting more and more depresed, LIFE SUCKS
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