Get Paid For
Using Social Sites!

Stop Anxiety
and panic attacks

How to overcome
your powerty demons

Save Your Relationship
No Matter How Bad
Your Situation Appears

LIFE SUCKS

Stories submitted by real people.

[Tell Your Story]

Categories:

Abuse  Addictions  Alcohol  Anger  Anxiety  Appearance  Attitude  Bad Luck  Childhood  Crime  Death  Disappointment  Drinking  Drugs  Environment  Failure  Family  Friendship  General  Health  Independent circumstances  Job  Justice  Juvenile problems  Life Story  Loneliness  Meaninglessness  Mistakes  Money  Philosophical  Poverty  Prank  Racial  Relationship  Religion  Reputation  School  Sexuality  Society  Sociopathy  Stepdad  Stepmom  Stress  Tragic Events  Unemployment  Violence  


Archive by Month:
July 2012
2012 June
2012 May
2012 April
2012 March
2012 February
2012 January
2011 December
2011 November
2011 October
2011 September
2011 August
2011 July
2011 June
2011 May
2011 April
2011 March
2011 February
2011 January
2010 December
2010 November
2010 October
2010 September
2010 August
2010 July
2010 June
2010 May
2010 April
2010 March
2010 February
January 2010
December 2009
November 2009
October 2009
September 2009
August 2009
July 2009
June 2009
May 2009
April 2009
March 2009
February 2009
January 2009
November 2008
October 2008
September 2008
May 2008
February 2008
January 2008


Ads:

drunk sailor

Posted by anonymous at April 12, 2012
Tags: 2012 April  Attitude  Drinking

I’m so sick of waking up to feel like this. I go to sleep feeling great but awake like this… cape codders and Bud heavy must drain the life out of me while I sleep. The only way to feel better is start the entire process over again. I’m sick of this cycle but I have to get up. I dawn my utilies, half polished boots, and ball cap. I say I wear this uniform with pride but certainly don’t look like it.
I feel too shitty for a beer this morning so I reach for a couple wine coolers. I drink them quickly while I shower and brush my teeth. People are starting to realize that I smell like booze every morning which led me to no choice but to start showering in the morning before work. I’m being quiet thought out this whole process because I don’t want to wake my roommate. For fucks sakes it’s only ten pass 0500.
I get to morning muster a few minutes early and chat about the night before, these are the convo’s I hate the most because its when I realize I have no clue what goes on after 2000 (8pm) most nights. It’s a blessing I make it back to the barracks with out getting in trouble I say to myself. Sometimes I’ll hear stories of what my friends will call crazy or funny. In reality there’s nothing funny about these antics, just small steps toured alcoholism.
Today is a different day though; I’m going over Darians house after work. We started talking a few weeks ago but I’m starting too really like her. She’s some what of a savoir because the days and nights I spend with her kept me from drinking, Even though it doesn’t always stop me. We’re only in the early stages of a relationship but she’s filling a void the navy stole from me.
At lunch time I skip chow so I can take a quick nap hoping it will remove the bags out from underneath my eyes. When I wake up I pack a bag for the night and smoke a cigarette on my way back to work. I’m anxious all afternoon because it will be the first real time staying over. I’m taking her out to a restaurant up the street from her house she keeps telling me she loves when we go by it. I plan on asking her to be my girlfriend tonight, if she says yes she will be my first legit girlfriend. I’m also at the point that I’m so sick of “partying” that having a girl would be awesome. (I actually stopped partying awhile back now I’m just drinking and using the “party” word as an excuse).
Towards the end of the work day my buddy Ivan tells me that we’re all drinking in his room tonight. I tell him no I can’t cause of my dinner date with Darian tonight. This being the first time I have said no to drinking since my arrival in California a few months back, a couple people give me shit. I don’t give a fuck what they think though because I knew I’m about to have a better night then all of them. The real reason I feel so good about saying no is because I’m actually choosing something over getting drunk. In my alcohol clouded brain this makes me think that I def don’t have problem drinking and that everything is ok.
(Four months later)… In reality my alcohol abuse isn’t ok. I’m three months into being completely in love and still drink way more then any 19 year old should. I ask my self “why the fuck cant I get out of this stage of my life” I have everything basically laid out in front of me, and I choose to piss it all down a toilet in a half million dollar California beach front condominium.


Votes:


Similar Entries:
bah October 2, 2010
yup. March 7, 2010
really am I alone? NOPE February 3, 2011
Why I'm i still alive? May 13, 2011
drinking, drugs and pain January 14, 2012



New Comment

Comments:
By anonymous at 26,May,12 01:24

Not your fault I have tears of denial. I hope drunk sailor finds his way as well.


By Vitim at 30,Jun,12 10:27

A 12-Step Meeting is a closed meteing of the religious organization, Alcoholics Anonymous. To attend a person must do what is called identify as an alcoholic, which is to say preface every single thing that they say at any Alcoholics Anonymous meteing with I am John Doe, and I am an alcoholic. During a 12-step Meeting portions of the Alcoholics Anonymous text The Twelve Steps and the Twelve Traditions are read. Usually members then speak about what they think the portions read might actually mean. The longer term members of Alcoholics Anonymous will usually give little mini-lectures about how Alcoholics Anonymous members are expected to interpret the text.Similarly, a Big Book Meeting is a closed meteing of the religious organization Alcoholics Anonymous. To attend a person must do what is called identify as an alcoholic, which is to say preface every single thing that they say at the meteing with I am John Doe, and I am an alcoholic. During a Big Book Meeting portions of the Alcoholics Anonymous text Alcoholics Anonymous (colloquially known as The Big Book ) are read. Usually members then speak about what they think the portions read might actually mean. The longer term members of Alcoholics Anonymous will usually give little mini-lectures about how Alcoholics Anonymous members are expected to interpret the text.Generally, these meteings are not suggested for newcomers to Alcoholics Anonymous. They are reserved for those who have at least subsumed themselves to the religious dogma to the extent that they are comfortable with identifying themselves as alcoholics and they have told the other Alcoholics Anonymous members that they are willing to turn their lives and wills over to the care of God.These more intensive text centered meteings are meant to solidify the person's entry into the inner, more knowing echelons of this religious organization.


By Gundosmed at 06,May,13 20:26

Aloha! hjh


By Womens Nike Kobe 9 Elite Shoes B at 02,Nov,14 11:35

RB 1 7 7. Apr 10at FinalNYM 3, Aug 31at FinalNYM 11, Jan 6vs 7:30 Wed, Nov 9vs FinalIND 96, "We don't have any reason at this stage to suspect terrorism," tweeted Alexey Pushkov,html" class="">retaking of the world No. to mark his


New Comment