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I am sad

Posted by jasmineg at March 16, 2012
Tags: 2012 March  Meaninglessness

I had a pretty hard childhood. I was bullied and abused both emotionally and physically and although I considered suicide from an early age, I always kind of had hope for the future I would say to myself things will be better when I growup. and for a while they did get better. I got married to a man who abused and manipulated me as well as cheated and lied to me. When he finally left I was relieved.

But now I am 36 and I have nothing to live for. No kids- all my "friends " have relationships or kids or both and I have nothing. So where is the happiness I have waited my whole life for?

The worst part is that I lost my faith in God. Even as a kid I had God when it seemed like I had no one else. But I lost my faith- I can't feel him. Maybe its because I am angry life turned out this way. I wish I could believe again.


New Comment

By anonymous at 17,Mar,12 16:55

You've got a new start. That's what you have to live for. No abusive man and no kids. Yes Kids are great, but they also consume your life.

There are plenty of things to live for. Are you smart? Yes, I believe you are. That's a good thing. We live in a world filled with dumb-asses. Are you pretty? Again I am going to say yes. Not just physical beauty. You probably have a beautiful spirit. And, the list goes on and on.

Listen, life is filled with both joy and challenges. Learn from your challenges and embrace the joy. Don't loose faith in yourself or God. He won't let you down.

By anonymous at 17,Mar,12 20:17

Each time when a door close, a new one opens. I lost my faith in God too, as well as everything else. But don't you ever lose faith in yourself! 36 means you're not a kid anymore, but you are not old as well! You can still find something that fulfills you and someone or something to rely on. Please don't give up, and trust me you are not alone, there is bunch of people out there feeling exactly like you. Take me for example. I don't even know you and I care about you because I know your pain. Never. Give. Up.

By anonymous at 17,Mar,12 20:19

Shut the. Hell up 'try keegles
By Cursed at 17,Mar,12 20:26

There's always one in the bunch.
Keegles may help with alot of things but unless this woman's god is her dildo- then she obviously doesn't need your smart, witty, asswipe, comments...
What's up with the angst kids?

By anonymous at 17,Mar,12 20:31

dick get super-hard watching Yasmin Lee fuck men bareback.

By anonymous at 18,Mar,12 04:48

Yasmin Lee, Fuck Yeah

By anonymous at 18,Mar,12 15:10

I had a crappy life to and I also had kids.I love them but they grew up and moved away, so Im back where I started, alone. I have Brain damage caused by a brain tumor that has made life one long tedious, painful exsistance. What I did is joined some online support groups and I hope I will find someone to skype with. Life does suck, but happiness is a state of mind not a place. Stop waiting. There are alot of people like me who would love to get to know you. As far as God goes, you may lose faith in him but he never loses faith in us. or ever stop loving us just the way we are. :)

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