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Completely Lost

Posted by anonymous at February 10, 2012
Tags: Failure  2012 February


Okay where to begin? Let's see...3 years ago I had a high-paying career, very fit/beautiful, benefits, my own place, freedom, friends and a loving boyfriend. When the economy sunk, I lost my job, benefits and then my boyfriend dumped me and married someone a year later. I lost all my friends because I was so damn depressed that I packed on 60 pounds and was ashamed for anyone to see me. When I look in the mirror, I cannot believe what I've become. Also, I had no idea what I could talk about since I had nothing going for me. Then I lost my freedom as I had to move back to my mothers house @ 30 years old.

Presently, I have been only able to hold down temporary gigs but my depression usually gets me fired or let go before my time is up. My car is about to break down on me and then I will have no transportation. Living with my mom has been pure hell. She tells me constantly how disgusting I am and how much she hates me and wants me out. Oh and she constantly is calling me a loser. Which technically, now at 32 and in my situation, I guess I am.. I have started college again but it just seems so hopeless as I have dug myself in such a deep hole that I don't think I can get out of. The last 3 years have been so miserable and I've been going through this completely alone as I cannot call one person my friend. Everyday feels like I'm just floating through and totally invisible to the real world.

I really hate my life.


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Similar Entries:
what a mistake i made February 10, 2012
shit happens April 5, 2010
I wish this torment would end September 16, 2010
untitled story November 23, 2011
My Life is Over May 18, 2011



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Comments:
By jueves at 22,Feb,12 01:27

this look like my own story .. but we still can go up. All i can say is: don't let a relationship ruin you. There is other things besides love and you should start looking for that. I wish you all the best!


By meowmeow at 22,Feb,12 10:58

meow~Back in college so soon? Why can't you try harder with that piece of paper you already have? What if the piece of paper you are working on now is useless as the other one you already have? Can't you sleep with someone just to get your car fixed? Can't you look for job in another state or english speaking country? Can't you leave your mum for good and never look back one day? MEOWMEOW for now.


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