LIFE SUCKS

girl lost

So you think life sucks huh? Well what I can say is that my family is healhty, but thats it. I am 30 years old didn't have parents growin up. Had my first child at 17 so I didn't go to prom. His father was abusive so I left him. Had my second child at 21. Her father is in prison for 18 years and I am stuck to raise them by myself. I did have a ok job but was laid off due to the economy. Lost my job, apt, bank account, car. Wow there goes the benefits for us. Well now I have no choice but to live with my old aunt and mother. With no male figure around my son is starting to get out of control. Seems like all of the decisions that I make are the wrong ones. Started going back to school which isn't working out because it seems like I am the oldest in my classes. This is something I shouls have been doing 10 yrs ago, but there was no one to tell me that. So here I am alone 30 yrs old, 2 kids, no job, no support. People keep telling me to be strong. It is easier said than done. I also have relationship problems can't find anyone genuine. Because of my body shape all guys talk about is my butt this and my butt that...what about me? Anyways let's not talk about the hater friends I've had for the longest can't seem to shake. Idk, it just seems like im getting backed into a corner and can't get out. Seems that I was doing ok untill I was laid off. Then things just seem to fall like a dominoe chain, one by one. Usually in this situation the other person would help out. I didn't have that help and really had to move back into my moms home. No one wants to date because I have two kids and am 30. At nite sometimes I dig in people trash for there recycle cans and bottles for extra cash. I cover myself up so no one sees me. Life sucks....must be nice for some huh??? eh!