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I never learned that trick...

Posted by Raz'Orii at December 29, 2011
Tags: 2011 December  Money  Unemployment

56 years old, two years of college, no friends or family I can turn to. Unemployed again, three months this time. I'm fortunate enough to be getting unemployment though that's only good for another couple of months. I had a good job, cooking and barbacking a few nights a week, so I had some money saved up.

From the first day I started looking diligently for work as best I could. I polished up my resume as best I could and from then on spent several hours a day scanning the listings on a number of the largest online job sites in search of anything for which I was even remotely qualified. I live in a large city so most days I was able to find two or three local jobs listed. I submitted applications and a copy of my resume for all of them. A couple of times a week I drove to the state employment office to look at their lists of jobs and to just talk with someone, trying to find some guidance to help improve the odds of my finding work.

It's been three and a half months now. My savings are all gone. I'm still getting $187 a week in unemployment which doesn't even begin to cover my living expenses. I have a housemate to share expenses with and have cut my spending back to the bare minimum and it's still not enough. I had recieved an email from an IT Staffing agency on Tuesday, looking for someone to fill a position with a local firm that looked quite promising but I learned this afternoon that the position had gone to someone else. No other prospects at this time.

The rent is due again in a couple of days. I've been putting what little money I could from what I get from enemployment towards my share of the utilities so there's only about $50 left in checking and a $20 bill in my wallet. Now my housemate, who's 67, is talking about packing it in and moving to Florida to live with his daughter.

I might have been able to find a minimum wage job somewhere but what's the point? Impossible for a single person to live on that, even more impossible to get by on unemployment alone. Or, if it is possible, it's a trick I never learned.

Feeling lost and alone. I've never been homeless before, never felt so out of options, never felt so utterly defeated. and yet, somehow, I can't bring myself to just give up. I have, at the least, until Monday the 2nd of January, to engineer some kind of miracle. On the other hand, I've been trying my hardest to get my life back on track and have accomplished exactly nothing, which is making it prtty hard to feel very optimistic about my prospects.

So what do I do now? Pack up what I can in my car and move somewhere else where there might be better prospects for employment? Where exacly is that? I read the news and it sounds like everyplace is suffering. Not that it matters, at $3 a gallon for gas (if you're lucky enough to find it that cheap) I wouldn't get more than a few hundred miles before I ran out of money for fuel. That's not far enough to get anywhere I could see being any better than where I am now. I could sell my car and everything else of value that I own and buy a bus ticket. But still, where would I go? It's not like there's anyone anywhere who'd be glad to see me if I showed up at their door and lacking a car I'd be even worse off when I got there than I am now. No, I guess I'm stuck here.

I guess it's time to grit my teeth and hope that the next few days will bring me some kind of miracle. Or, I could wrap my arms real tight around a cinderblock and go jump in the river. Nevermind, not quite ready to do THAT yet.


Votes:


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Very Unhappy December 27, 2010



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Comments:
By anonymous at 27,Jan,12 17:37

Suck it up. It is not my fault that you were not born into a wealthy family or a Mason and live in luxury. It is your fault why you are poor and no one else. If the rich make all that money, then by American Capitalist standards, they have earned every red cent of it and can do with it as they please. Maybe you should learn Mandarin Chinese and move over there to work in a sweatshop. Too many people in the world and somebody has got to lose. The wealthy have their wealth from hard work and the souls that get born into rich families did good deeds in past lives to have that honor. God determined it that way. Now get out of my way as I decide to vote for either Newt or Mitt.
By anonymous at 27,Jan,12 22:57

That is such bull shit. I'm guessing you see yourself as one of the people born into a wealthy family but "did good deeds in past lives to have the honor", YEAH RIGHT. I have had plenty of experiences with people born into rich families and even if they did do some good deeds in a past life, does that give them the right to now treat everyone else like shit? This person is having a hard time, feels alone and is reaching out to anyone on the internet who may be able to relate. They don't need YOU telling them to shut up. What the heck do you even get from writing something like that?
YOU suck it up. It's not my fault your an idiot.
By kifi4@hotmail.com at 28,Jan,12 08:16

Yeah, some people REALLY begins commenting on others people with "Suck it up, it is not my fault...." I didn't know people do that until I read what you reply to a moment a go.

I don't think your reply has done enough justice for the original poster enough. Thanks for acting rightously. Please visit this site more often.


By anonymous at 28,Jan,12 01:43

Ok, I can help. First thing, look at how you were at your job. You were doing fine. You seemed fine, probably felt fine and were okay. Until something happened. It seemed you were initially negative in attitude after being unemployed. It may have not been much, but it was enough to slowly get you on a downhill path of negativity coupled with worse things happening progressively over time that didn't help you feel better at all. Instead of realign yourself with what would help (though you may not have known how to get a job the most effective way), it seemed you kept trying, but only enough, and things didn't quite fall into place at all. The worse things got, the worse you felt. The worse you felt, the more hopeless it seemed you appeared. Until it didn't seem anything good was happening at all. Okay, now here's how to fix that. Recognize that bad things happen. A lot sometimes. Sometimes all at once, but they do happen. Now let's look at your attitude over time. It seems to have gotten worse, or more negative, as reacting to the bad things happening. It also seems there is a slight victim mentality going along with this experience. First, realize you are not a victim, that you do have control and things can get better. Second, realize things do happen, as stated before, and that it is okay. Third, find a goal that you wish to achieve, like getting a new job, paying biils, being happy, ect, and achieve it. Difficult part is knowing how to do that. Notice I didn't say, try to get a job, try to be happy, try to whatever. I said to do it. Doing something is different from trying. You can do anything you feel you can do as long as it is actually possible to achieve. And getting a job and being happy is definitely possible. So go do it. Don't try online boards, or online this or that. Find what kind of job you could do, anywhere they are hiring at the moment, find out if they need help, then be that help. Put yourself out there. That's how you get a job. Most online and paper applications are never given a second look. In person is almost the only way. Fourth, there is plenty of help needed all over the place. Find it, and show that person in charge that you are that help. Do whatever you have to do; do what others wont, and you will have a job. While you are working, you can make another goal to get a better paying job or schooling or career choice, and do that too. Business, whatever. Just do it. And you will get there. And gauge your attitude. Everyday. It's your compass to where you are at mentally. Be honest with yourself and how you feel, and go to the direction that benefits you most. My story: Worked for 7 years with my gf, had a fight, broke up, suffered from severe depression for 2 years, almost killed myself twice, out of work for over 2 years. In the hospitol, I chose life. To do something for myself. In 2 days, I got 2 jobs, and almost a 3rd. Getting ready to start work next week, and will be busy as hell. I hope everything goes well but it's late and I have my life to live now. And you do too. So go get there :)
By anonymous at 28,Jan,12 03:08

i'm not the writer of the original dilemma but i'm glad to have read your response. A great attitude to take me away from being self destructive with negative feelings that ultimately leads to more negative outlook on everything. you are right it is a downward spiral. Doing something is the right course anything positive to break the cycle. So thank you.


By at 28,Jan,12 03:38

Hey Raz'Orii,
I know life is hard for you right now but don't give up. I could only offer my humble advice. I pray that it would help you. Here it is.
1. Try to hold on a job.
2. Save & don't waste your money on unnecessary things.
3. Take one step at a time. Build things slowly. Your savings, relationship or other things. It's perseverance that matters.

Good luck,pal.


By anonymous at 28,Jan,12 03:46

Heres something id like you to read, please give it some thought. I hope the best for you, dont look down on yourself, look up.

Best regards,
Kevin

If you ask for forgivness for your sin and accept Jesus as Lord and Saviour you will have LIFE, eternal life. Jesus will help you, care for you, change you (and your life). His love is everlasting, no matter what sins or garbage you've been, in he will forgive you, and love you with love that can't be compared. What do you have to lose? atleast give it a shot. God exists, big bang theory my ASS what created the darn thing? God did. God uses the weak, the powerless, the hurt and the lonely in GREAT ways. Heres a word from Jack Graham: A potter will take a helpless, lifeless lump of clay and then knead it and squeeze it until it's soft and pliable. And then when he gets it just right, he takes that piece of clay and he does something called throwing, where he places the clay on a spinning table.

And as that clay is placed upon that turning wheel, the potter's hands then begin to pressure the clay and work it until he makes something beautiful out of that old ugly piece of clay.

Here's the lesson God wanted Jeremiah to hear: He is the true master craftsman. He is a potter who is making something beautiful out of every life. He will take the old ugly mistakes and sins and make them into something completely new!

When you truly know God, you can live victoriously! So whatever the ugliness is in your life, be assured that through the blood of Christ, God molds you and makes you into something beautiful!
There are thousands if not millions of people that can testify to jesus saving and changing them (and their life for the better!).


By check out these guys! at 16,Oct,13 12:06

rSbl0q Great, thanks for sharing this blog article.Much thanks again.


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