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fucked from the start

Posted by anonymous at September 29, 2011
Tags: Appearance  Independent circumstances  Life Story  2011 September

so my father dies when im only 10 months old. my mother decides she wants to move to the united states. we do on a 3 month visa. i was only 1 year old at the time. we go to newyork. my mother is barely 21 and decides she'd rather enjoy her 20's than stick by her son and be a good mother. im left to be raised by my grandmother and whatever babysitter they can afford to put the burden of my life upon. fast forward 15 years and we live in georgia now. mother is now an overprotective jesus freak. i cant get a job because my visa ran out 14 years ago and am considered "ineligible to work in the united states". That means no drivers license either. Stranded at home and BEGGING for rides from friends when they can spare one at their goddamn convinience. im a very independant person and having to rely on others causes me alot of frustration, stress, and anxiety. i turn 16, puberty hits and my face breaks out like a ticking time bomb. mom had the same in her teens, so geneticaly im fucked. puberty+stress+shitty genes+being to fucking poor to see a doctor+mother not caring enough to provide as much as a little knowledge or support+poor mans diet=total face fuck. i mean these werent just pimples, but deep rooted, puss filled balls from fucking hell. even without picking at them they managed to fuck me up completely. im 20 now and have horrble scars all over my face. i cant even go outside without people GAWKING at me. peoples faces are what greets the world, its what people remember you by, its what makes you,YOU. Lifes given me just enough to not be able to bitch and wine but has fucked me up enough to where i just wanna jump off a fucking bridge. This is just fucking cruel. even people with terminal illnesses know that theirs an end in sight (death perhaps) but i have to spend my entire life looking and feeling like SHIT. just incase you need a mental picture of what i look like, take your face, run it through a meat grinder and then tap dance on it with cleets on. then pick it up and put it back on. and you have me. FUCK LIFE AND ITS CRUEL JOKES.


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By at 07,Dec,11 23:45

You ready for battle? I gna tell you upfront~ There are no "instant" victories & there will be some har roads, but only you can be your own hero with the current circumstances you face.
I can only lead you to a door, what you do to further your knowledge through research & contacting is completely in your hands.
I warn it is going to take a very strong, disciplined, & rare type of young person that is willing to fight for themselves.
contact Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid or research others who are trying to help kids like you that are stuck in limbo. Read some of the options listed there, keep your nose clean.

Now to your prblem with outbreaks. That does suck, but as a grown woman & not from pity, but HONEST hard to swallow truth, i wil tell you, after you deal with your main battle of immigration, you will have forgotton your teenage woes. Look at Brad Pitt, he is scarred rom his outbreaks... I myself have dated men that have scars. To be honest one of them who had very bad scars was actually the most handsome goodlooking man i have ever seen. He always had great looking level headed quality girls in his life & many girls vying for his attention.
Confidence & humour can take any person anywhere they want to go in life.
It is a shame you do not have as much support as a young person should, but unfortunately that is the american standard... half ass parents are a dime a dozen, so focusing on that wont get you very far.
Please i am not eloquent~ there is only one way things will be set right & as you deserve them to be good... Anyone can drive a car, but how many young men your age can drive their lives? I think that you can. Start now beacuse once you hit 18 the rules change. Find a childrens immigration advocay group to help you.

By anonymous at 30,Dec,11 00:49

I would be willing to help you out with makeup. There are so many things that would help! Seriously, even if you're a guy, wouldn't you rather wear makeup and look perfect than have people gawk at you? Reply if you want me to help.

By anon at 24,Mar,12 20:56

Oh man, I'm sorry.

Don't rely on your mom. I'm in Canada, and they're a bit more helpful here, so I don't have much advice for the US, but there's gotta be somewhere... some program that can help you.

As for the scars, you're a guy. Be relieved. We (girls) don't care that much.. just be groomed, and treat girls well but don't be a pushover. There is someone out there waiting for you. I know how you feel. I want to die cause of how I look. Blah.

I really hope you are able to find something.. and some way to get out of your situation. Just don't rely on anyone.

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By Amberlee at 20,May,16 11:34

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