Well, I can't say anything has ever gone right in my life. I early on realized being the middle child was a difficult position to fulfill. My sister being 3 years older was love and doted on when she was born. I got that same thing, for 11 months, then my little brother was born and well...that's when my life started sucking. At 6 my parents divorced. At 11 my cousin died on 911 in one of the plane crashes into the tower, following the year anniversary my grandmother was being killed by cancer. She passed away that year, when I was 12, of leukemia. Three days later my aunt committed suicide. Five days later my grandfather suffered a severe stroke, was hospitalized and deemed incapable of coming out of his vegetative state. With those deaths, I was hoping it to be the end. In 2004 my father, with the loss of his mother, committed suicide as well. :D So I was left fatherless, one grandparent down on each side of my parents, and my mother's sister. Shortly things slowed down, my life began to mellow out. Finally people stopped dying! Then at 17 I got into illegal activities, pursuing a self-destructive path while dealing with the constant fighting between my eldest sister and mother fighting and blaming each other for all their problems and my father's death. Eventually the police report came back to us years later, only for us to learn that my father wasn't trying to kill himself, he was trying to alleviate extensive pain in his jaw. My father overdosed on acetaminophen, on accident. There was nothing my sister could do but it drove her more mad then she already was. She became hospitalized for being crazy, I was avoiding all of my family, working to save up money to support myself and my addiction. Working hard, I moved up in the ranks, showing my dedication, but quickly my body started to shut down. After a year of dealing with unusual vomiting, migraines, and noise bleeds, I was found out front of a local YMCA. I was rushed to the hospital, diagnosed with a failed adrenal gland, a unusual cyst, and infection on my stomach. Several months after that I under went invasive surgery to have my adrenal gland, the cyst, and a small portion of my stomach removed. I was able to walk and work again 6 weeks later, and I did. Once again things seemed normal, in the end I was arrested for possession of illegal narcotics, sentenced brief time, rehabilitated through a outdoor patient program and walked away from my own demise. I'm 21 now...but for some reason, despite everything I've dealt with...people are now dying again at an unexpected rate, my mother has become a drunk, and I've been forced in and out of my own home more times than I can count. :( I know this is me just bitching and I know people are going to say something negative or rude like; "suck it up" or "stop being a little bitch", but honestly, I feel so shitty and angry over how my life has been going that maybe somebody else has gone through something similar and can at relate...Well, at least I know that if they say it's true about Karma; what comes around goes around, I'm thinking I might be getting rich in my later life. :3 I know it'll all be better one day, just wish that day was tomorrow, even better, today, but it's my goal I have to strive for to achieve. | |
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