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I am depressed

Posted by anonymous at June 25, 2011
Tags: Family  Job  2011 June  Money

I'm not sure whether if life sucks for me. I'm going on 30 later this year and I feel like I haven't accomplished anything in life yet. Recently, my father told me that I ruined my family's restaurant business with my poor judgement. Hearing that from my old man, it took a huge beating out of my soul. Initially, I lashed out in anger wondering, why the hell he was blaming this all on to me. But after gathering things into perspective, I now know I am a failure.
I've been working for my family since I was 14 years old in High School and all I know about anything in the world was our family business. I thought I dedicated all my life into our family's business but I guess I wasn't doing my job right. I fucked up. My family is down under and about to lose the house that my father bought for me and my late brother.
I live in the same house that my brother died about 6 years ago. I still remember the day when I went upstairs to wake him up, opening door to finding him lifeless from his suicide.
I'm not sure if I miss my brother or daughter more? My baby daughter lives 6 hours away in another state with her mother. I haven't seen her in over a year now and I feel like I have failed her too as well. Daddy was suppose to make a lot money for both her and mommy this year, but now I have to make a career change to make this all happen. GOD please watch out after my daughter, her mother, and my parents.
Lord make me stronger and help me make wise decisions.
I hope this new career path I have chosen will make things right for everybody whom I've disappointed.
You know, I'm just an ignorant fuck when it comes to life. I took things for granted when my brother was around. I really miss you heong. I have to call Mr Suh tommorow and ask for advise onto becoming a mortician. I hope this is my true calling in life. I love serving people and making people happy, but obviously, I've lost respect from a lot of people in town from opening this restaurant.
Yes, my life does suck right now. I'm in major debt, but hopefully there is a light at the end of the tunnel


Votes:


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New Comment

Comments:
By anonymous at 23,Jul,11 15:19

Good job, keep on fighting. And you will prosper. Hope is all you need to succeed. Hope I helped :)


By anonymous at 23,Jul,11 21:30

You sound like a really sweet person. Good Luck!


By anonymous at 24,Jul,11 04:10

this guy is asking GOD for help, you're doomed zealot, you deserve your fate


By anonymous at 25,Jul,11 15:22

Well, the recession has hit many businesses, surely you're not the only one who had something to do with it all...
If your dad was so smart he could've stepped in and offered better ideas and/or saved the place, no? If he decided to step away from it all, it was his decision...
Some people often do find it easier to 'blame' someone or quarrel or fight...
Apparently your brother has had problems too, a thing like that can affect a family very much... (or the house may have bad feng shui/energy/mold or such? - hopefully not!!) If your dad was a bully, your brother was maybe affected by that too?

This was a learning experience for you and hopefully you've learnt from it... You've got a daughter and she can be your shining light, even from another state!!

Hope your new career will go well, or at least you will have learnt something from it or maybe meet people who can maybe help you later too, maybe all you've learnt can be useful later on too!!


By anonymous at 25,Jul,11 20:36

i am sure that you are not completely responsible for restaurant going under. You sound like a good person-and you sound like you need to forgive yourself and do something kind for you and to help others each day. I believe that your life will get better and it's true that we all learn from our mistakes that is part of life. hang in there and know that several people who have not even met you care and our rooting for you.


By anonymous at 02,Aug,11 14:58

I'm praying for you, bro


By at 27,Nov,12 22:17

Suprrising to think of something like that


By Esther at 28,Nov,12 15:56

Why do I bother calling up poplee when I can just read this!


By Nike?Zoom?Lunarposite at 15,Aug,14 11:43

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