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Does life = pain & suffering?

Posted by anonymous at January 11, 2011
Tags: Family  Health  2011 January  Job  Money

I am a 28yrs old woman. Single and stuck in a bullshit job that will never lead me anywhere.As a child I was born a premature baby & the doctors gave me only 6 months to live. Someone I managed to survive only now I wish I hadn't. This is a story of how my life sucks.

My dad & mom had a terrible marriage.It was a arranged marriage. They never loved each other & my dad accused us of not being his children. My brother & I had to take a painful blood test just to prove that we were indeed his and following that it was a case of a terrible divorce and eventually led to my father committing suicide. I was only 10 then.

Following that mom was always working, trying the settle debts my dad left behind & too tired to talk to me.I could not really blamed her as she herself might have felt that her life sucks.I was always alone with my brother. Soon after my brother started to physically abuse me, kicking me on my stomach,face & the other parts. This stopped when he eventually left the house.

In school the kids always made fun of me and used to call me crazy and specky. None of them really wanted to be my friends. I always felt like an outcast and many times I spent recess time alone.

At the age of 16, I developed an ovarian benign tumor that grow so big that people actually thought I was pregnant. I had to be hospitalized and had to have the left side of my ovary cut off and am left with a bad keloid scar on my stomach that is 15cm long. Till now it hurts badly when I get my menses and I ever wonder is I could ever produce children.

My mom,a sickly woman with diabetes type 3 & high blood pressure. She had to stop working and soon after I got my diploma, I had to work to support my family. I always wanted to do my degree & get my driving licence but it seems impossible now with my current financial situation.Recently she was diagnosed with breast cancer. I had to take up another job in the evening and pay through my nose to settle the medical bills and am also currently trying the buy back the jewelery we had pawned and this adds on to my financial burden.

With all these problems, I wonder if I would ever be settled in life. My life is a huge question mark. Many times I felt like committing suicide just like my dad did.I try to be positive but another problem always seems to pop out. The men in my life I met all made use of me either for body or money. None of then every loved me even though I always try to give my all. Surprisingly these guys have all settled happily from what I seen & heard.

I know that I am not the only one with problems in my life. I was never one to complain. It seems that 90% of my life is filled with problems. I asked God when will my life get better.


Similar Entries:
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New Comment

By anonymous at 29,Jan,11 15:43

You sound like such a strong woman. And by the sounds of it, it seems like you're a christian woman. Don't give up on faith. Ask God to change you into the person that he wants you to be. And pray with sincerity in your heart while you're talking to God. Just pour out your heart to God. And surround yourself with positive people, befriend positive people. Trust me this situation (nightmare) that you are in is temporary. It is making you a stronger person each and every day. I can tell you right now you are a stronger person than me. Just promise me 1 thing. DON'T GIVE UP! (in translation: DON'T COMMIT SUICIDE!) that's the coward's way out. If u commit suicide, you will just have a crappier after life. I will pray for you. You will be very successful one day.

By anonymous at 30,Jan,11 01:19

just focus your attention to your jobs and to taking care of your mom. do not dwell on the pasts, move forward and be strong. men come and go, they don't matter to you at this point. do not ever give up =)

By anonymous at 30,Jan,11 02:50

And you wonder if you're ever going to be able to have children?? Listen, if you're life is any indication to you, hopefully you WON'T be able to have any children. Why on earth would you ever want to subject another human being to the torturous shit you've had to go through in your miserable life? Just think about it. DON'T have kids, okay? Kids are a wonderful, precious, miraculous, beautiful thing. Don't RUIN that wonderful, precious, miraculous, beautiful thing by subjecting it to life on this piece of shit we call planet Earth.

By anonymous at 31,Jan,11 19:19

um who the fuck are you to tell someone to not have a kid. She just blurted out her whole life story probably trying to make sense of herself and you write this shit? Are you fucking serious. You are the most rudest person I have ever seen post on shit like this. If she wants a kid and a family of her own I'm pretty sure she would do everything she can to make sure they don't ever live the life she had to live. It's not her fault that she was raised in the enviornment she was in and that doesn't give you NO right at all to write something like that. Your fuckin retarded and need to get a fucking life. I cannot believe that someone so ignorant would actually write something like that. It's people like you that make people like us come to these stupid sites to write about how our life sucks. It's because we live around a bunch of moronic assholes like yourself. Dumb fuck
By anonymous at 01,Feb,11 00:28

lol. Rockin'. :))
By anonymous at 01,Feb,11 01:01 Fold Up

lol. That makes a lot of sense, eh? If it is practically guaranteed that a kid IS indeed going to have to go through a horrendously torturous life, you'd actually want to have the kid anyway . . . uh . . . and why? Uh . . . because life is precious? because you'd be a good parent (even though your own life has proven to be torturous)?

I can't even come up with a proper witticism here. Look, the person's life posting here SUCKS. My heart truly does go out to her/him. I'm sorry. Life sucks. That's why there are sites like this one. Okay. That his/her life sucks is one thing, however (and, again, I am sorry for that) . . . but you wanna perpetuate that pain and suffering into a KID? And put them through all the shit they're likely going to have to go through being born under those circumstances??

You (and the poster, and anyone else thinking that having a kid under such circumstances is, somehow, okay) are part of the reason that this planet is a festering cespool of hell and filth.

Kids, again, should NOT be born under anything less than the best, most ideal circumstances that can be given to them. They are a newborn life, and deserve as much of an opportunity for physical, financial, and psychological success as possible. To knowingly and willingly start them off under crippling circumstances is, I think, very, very ignorant, punishable, and sinful.

Anyway. My opinion. Obviously a whole SHIT load of human beings on earth don't have this opinion (yourself included).

Rock on. God speed to you, the poster, and whoever else. : )
By anonymous at 01,Feb,11 01:18

And hey . . . to the original poster (w/the ovarian tumor) . . . your life DOES suck. And I AM indeed sorry. Don't think I'm coming down too hard on you. I know my posts just sounded absolutely horrible, and - whether I have a good point or not - I am indeed sorry if how I said it was quite a bit too harsh and crass. Sometimes it doesn't matter if you're right or not. I don't necessarily want to or mean to just be a completely mean person to you. So, if you're reading, these posts and came across this one, I hope you've gotten this far and are realizing that 1) I do apologize, and 2) didn't mean any malice toward you yourself.

This was (and still is) my point, however: I know the "crowning achievement" of sooo many people on earth is to have a child . . . but given how bad life on this planet often is, and given how tough your own situation seems, perhaps having a kid shouldn't entirely be that huge of a concern, eh? Seems with your condition, birth might even prove fatal if it were possible.

Ultimately, I don't mean any ill intent toward you, okay? I just don't like it when people (not saying you personally feel like this . . . I don't know. But I don't like it when people) don't THINK about the massively, monumentally HUGE responsibility involved in having a kid and having to rear a life and be responsible for raising a personality. The vast, vast majority of us human beings are NOT fit to be parents - and yet so many keep having kids that end up being nothing more than criminals because their parents either didn't want them, or didn't have the means to raise them properly.

Anyway . . . enough.

Best to you.

And to the individual who responded to my initial statement, I'm sure they feel content to simply judge anyone who posts as a complete loser/jerk, etc, etc. Life is much, much more complicated than that. At any given moment in time, we are ALL one another in action and deed. Mother Teresa is Charles Manson; Jeffery Dahmer is Ghandi. We are all each other.

. . .
By anonymous at 03,Feb,11 15:44

dude like if she wants to have kids let her! Her life may be going bad but she can prevent this for people in the future! if she stays strong and just tries as hard as she can then she WILL get through this and if she makes a steady life for herself then any kids she might have will have a good life. Every family has their ups and downs but she has the same potential for a family as many people out there have. the world isnt a horrible place. only to those who make it that way.
By anonymous at 10,Feb,11 00:34

To say "The world's not a horrible place." is not a horrible sentiment. Only problem is, however, that it actually IS a horrible place for a HUGE percentage of humans living on it. Really. Don't delude yourself. Wake up. Seriously. Read the stories on this fucking website, okay? Life DOES indeed suck.

I wish you were right - life only sucks to those who make it that way. You might be right, but there's a LOT of stuff we're simply ignorant of, so a lot of times we don't know HOW life got fucked up or what to do to fix it . . . so it stays bad and gets worse. And then some people want to bring innocent kids into an already fucked up life? You see where this is going right?

By anonymous at 30,Jan,11 12:34

please just hang on u will pull thro'

By anonymous at 30,Jan,11 12:35

please hang on u seem very brave n full of enduranc

By anonymous at 30,Jan,11 19:06

wow and i thought my life sucked

By anonymous at 31,Jan,11 00:55

I'm sorry, I hope your life brightens up for, I'll pray for you. Good luck in life, it makes me think that I am so lucky to have what I do. Good parents, everything I need in life, a good home. Good luck.

By anonymous at 31,Jan,11 07:01

u sound so ghetto, bitch
By anonymous at 31,Jan,11 19:23

you sound like an uneducated asshole....
she sounds like someone who survived and i don't think she would like to be called a bitch, but i guess that would make you a son of a bitch right?

Don't listen to what these idiots say, they get pleasure out of making other people feel like shit because they have nothing and nobody who loves them. They are rotten scum ....... they are probably grown ass men living in their parents basement and 300 punds overweight...

By anonymous at 31,Jan,11 19:16

I just wanted to say that unlike many of the stories I have read on here you actually have a reason to complain. It might actually do you some good to get all of that out. Also i'm only 19 years old, but you are an inspiration. No matter what you've been through it seems like your always trying to do what's right and I comend you for that. There's not many people in the world that are strong anymore, but you are. I think you will find happiness someday and even though you may not believe it, it will happen when you need it the most. God knows how strong you are and how much you can handle, but i think your time is going to come and you'll be happy. I'm not very religious, but I just had that feeling as i was reading your post. Don't never give up, karma works in mysterious ways.

By anonymous at 31,Jan,11 19:29

To refer to your title:

In life,

Pain is inevitable
Suffering is optional

Just keep doing the right things and eventually everything will work itself out. It always does.

By anonymous at 01,Feb,11 08:07

ok, my life sucks too, and i had 4 children. I really wish i hadn't, but birth control doesn't work for everyone. The real problem here is money. Kids, and life on this planet is expensive. And, suffering is not optional, what a horrible thing to say to someone who is hurting so much. Try telling that to the 90% of the people on this planet who live on less than a dollar a day per peraon in their family. I know several. I agree, people with depression, and/or not enough money shouldn't have children because the emotional weight of taking care of them is a lot to deal with. The truth is, this planet is made out of suffering, and there isn't alot u can co about it

By anonymous at 03,Feb,11 12:11

whip that azz

By anonymous at 03,Feb,11 18:39
watch this,maybe it will help you..
By anonymous at 10,Feb,11 00:25

Wow. Powerful video about the guy w/no limbs. Life (on Earth) STILL fucking sucks big time whether you have no limbs or 500 limbs . . . But dang. That dude rocks w/his message, etc.

By anonymous at 29,Mar,12 00:43

Its very sad to know but there is always a silver lining in the cloud .I understand how life has been cruel to you but trust in the God always and do good .I may sound philosophical but Then if Life gives you pain it soothes the pain too.
Life is a journey and we have to face many obstacles but never loose hope because God has plans for you and one day you will rejoice

Iam writing this mail after ayear your blog was posted i hope things have turned for your better now otherwise also iam sure things will change for the best

Rather than waiting for the storm to stop learn to dance in the rain

God Bless you

By Reebok at 06,Oct,14 02:41

Aku kemudiannya mengunci basikal kesayanganku. Cinta yang sentiasa membawa kebahagiaan kepada hati, =).¡°no thank you!¡± kata hayati yang dipanggil ?? apa yang akan si kecil ini teriakkan padaku disaat ia perlukanku.ibu mak ummi mama suamiku hanya tersenyum melihat gelagatku sambil memberi ciuman kasih didahikulamunanku menjadi semakin indah hari demi hariku usap perutku setiap waktuku bisikkan kata-kata indah pada bayiku teramat sayang padamu wahai anakku.sebelum jenazah anakku disemadikan sempat kusisipkan photo aku bersama suami di balutan putih tubuh kecil anakku.sempat jua ku ambil bekas-bekas kain putih itu yang dipotong untuk kusimpan sebagai pengubat rindu

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