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Waiting

Posted by anonymous at May 15, 2012
Tags: Alcohol  Drugs  2012 May

For as long as I can remember I never really fit in with any sort of group, always seemed to be the odd one out. I had different interests and I went through grade school to high school surrounding myself with groups of people who never really understood me. The only thing that seemed to give me pleasure and attention was the fact that I was sort of reckless and dangerous behavior became normal for me. I'm so self conscious, I felt giving myself this sort of outlook would help me gain confidence. Alchohol and marijuana became a huge part of my life during my last three years in high school, after graduating my behavior became a problem and I had been arrested numerous times for drug distribution, possession and drunk driving. I'm so caught up in fines and lawyer fees that I've caught myself being an accessory to burglary. I keep saying i need to change the way I am but every time I say no more, the next thing I know I'm sitting in a police station. I stopped surrounding myself with the people I hang out with and am more lonely than ever; Im 20 and have nothing to show for my actions except a court date and a serious alcohol problem. Tonight I will attend my first AA meeting. My family always supports me and I never grew up with a horrible background, it makes me wonder why I am the way I am. Self consciousness has probably played more of a role in this than I realize. Im also an artist and hope to get into the tattoo business, I have a few horrible tattoos that also drive me crazy but that's the least of my problems right now. I'm just waiting for this chapter of my life to be over. Waiting.


Votes:


Similar Entries:
Just waiting. February 27, 2012
Waiting to leave this world. December 27, 2009
Wow. Life is so crappy. June 15, 2010
35 and life August 14, 2011
i have no hope in life October 28, 2011



New Comment

Comments:
By anonymous at 16,May,12 13:28

I wish eternal suffering upon U you frustrated, miserable piece of shiT.


By Cursed at 18,May,12 12:29

Dear friend-
Whatcha waiting for? Get a small business loan- join the local Rotary Club. Interview someone who actually owns a tatoo business. Stop fucking around, drinking, cut down on the weed- a joint a day keeps the doc away! But seriously, get over it! Pull yourself away from the computer, call up a tatoo shop, go in and get the low down! Write up a business plan/proposal. Get your family involved- and do something with your life! You can do it!
Cursed


By anonymous at 21,May,12 11:45

can you get me some weed


By anonymous at 04,Jun,12 21:28

Yeah go to AA, all those people quit drinking however the majority of them are stoned on weed all the time, but for the grace of god they say they are sober. One crutch to another


By anonymous at 04,Jun,12 21:37

You may want to consider a tatto removal shop. That is the future. With all the artists and people getting tats so they look like a walking cartoon, human nature is to want what you can't have, I already know some people have startedbadmiring a clean skinned body au natural so to speak, so that is the future


By anonymous at 01,Sep,12 18:37

And my final comment to all you dirtbags who have harassed me is FUCK YOU ASSHOLES.


By anonymous at 17,Oct,12 10:48

how the fuck do you post a story...????


By anonymous at 17,Feb,13 19:21

Yo, we're in the same boat, man.


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citizen security.etc. We need to remain focused on the economy


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