I can barely stand the fact that I'm single...i think its loneliness that get to me the most. I have noone who understands me. Noone can see all the things these cuts hide, or understand the reason for this bottle in my hand. I hate myself. The depression is hard to fight over and over again, so I will raise my white flag and surrender to the dark. I used to be scared of death but now it seems to be the only way to get these thoughts out of my head. What am i supposed to do? Your the only one that can save me and you know this. You konw if you gave me the time of day I would be fixed forever. Being your best friend is driving me crazy. Everytime you ask for my blessing with a new girl I wanna say no because I want you, but your happiness is more important to me thatn mine, so i say yes she seems right for you. Will I ever be happy or oneday or will i finally just pull the trigger. I've decided to pull the trigger after I know for sure that you have read my story......i love you andrew....always have always will. | |
I'm sorry that you are depressed. However I do hope that Andrew does not read your story, because it will probably make him run away from you as fast as he can. Do you think any man will appreciate this kind of drama? They will NOT. Let me tell you, even the nicest guy will become tired.
And, most importantly, it is NOT true that only Andrew can save you or "fix" things. This is the hard lesson to be learned, only YOU can change it. Only your will can change the way you are thinking now. If you don't want things to improve, no one can do it for you. No matter how much you love them, or how much they love you back.
I know you don't like what I wrote above, but I guess it is time to grow up..? My sincere advice to you is to be honest with him. Tell him how you feel. If he doesn't feel the same way for you, then it might be best for you to be apart at least for a while. Do not make your life dependent on someone else. If Andrew does not love you, someday some other guy will. But first you have to learn how to love yourself. Stop obsessing about being single, go to therapy, make new friends, workout (it helps...), whatever it takes. You deserve better from yourself.
And besides. How do you think he'll feel if you killed yourself and he knitted it was his
And besides. How do you think he'll feel if you killed yourself and he d it was his fault? It would kill him. Because he trusts you. He seeks your advice. Would he be happy when you're gone? No. He's nut the only person alive. There are other people who love you too.
Love.
only
Andrew ain't worth it. You know you can do better- Who needs to live being an emotional punching bag? This Andrew guy is using you. He won't care if you "Off Yourself". So as you're floating above your dead body- he will be targeting some other poor sucker... Don't give him the satisfaction, pull yourself together. Go see someone. Check yourself into the hospital if you must. But don't kill yourself over someone else- they won't care. And you'll be dead.
Cursed
Andrew sounds like a special guy. You may not be with him, but he would be devastated when he finds out you committed suicide. Ditto for your family.
Just wait. Don't pull the trigger. And talk to someone now about what you're dealing with. Someone will understand.
1-800-273-8255 National Suicide Prevention Lifeline
I tell you men are shallow. We go for looks and physical attraction. The girlfriend that treated me the best in my younger days was the one I least cared about. I ended up marrying another girl who has a very temper but I thought she was hot.
My point is forget this Andrew guy. Love is a 2 ways street. if it clicks it clicks. You can't force it. Open yourself for new opportunity. You never know. You may find someone even better and most importantly genuinely in love with you.
l somehow woken up and noticed what was going on. Do you know what went through my head? I have to get rid of her asap!
If she died because of me would I feel guilty? Probably yes. But I'm sure I would get over it in no time. Is it worth it for her to kill herself over me? Absolutely NOT!
Now lets fast forward 10 years.
Right at this moment I am feeling a bit depressed because my girlfriend is fucking, please pardon my language, seeing another guy. We are supposed to be friends with benefit but I'm madly in love with her. She treated me like shit but yet I miss her. You see? Love is not a fair game. Just make sure you are on the side with the upper hand.
I used to watch that cartoon.. I remember to like it. I keep asking me how old are you, how you grew up, your dreams, ... hey wait! I do care about you! So you already have someone who care about you!
Girl, sometimes life's pretty tricky. It seems that everything is lost, and then, all of a sudden, the sunny and colorful times are back. Maybe even a honey pot!
Sometimes, I can get really down. And sometimes the others' lawn seems much greener than mine. But even if I have no damn idea how to get out of the situation, I know that time will do its job. After a storm comes a calm!
If you ever need to talk someone, write me! zehcarioca86brazil@gmail.com
Why doesn't he wear any pants and why the fuck the red shirt and whyis he soooooo stupid!?!?!?!?
And he kinda reminds me of pedo bear with him running around that Christoppher kid with no pants...
I'm sorry I had to get that off my chest :D
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