| | Posted by anonymous at March 14, 2012 |
I just realized that the only purpose of life for all people, from the rich to the poor, is money. It is all about money and it seems so fucking artificial. I see people working their ass' off everyday, just for a week vacation in which they can relax and do nothing. Then the cycle continues, over and over again, they go back to work, work extremely hard just for another week of vacation, it seems so pointless. For myself, I am trying to find the purpose of life and the point of my existence. I found that everyone's goal is to get money in order to pleasure themselves with 'toys'. Asking around, it seems true for all people and even worse, it seems as though people don't give a damn about it. Everyone just wants to get through life with the least amount of troubles and it is so depressing. I don't understand what the point of life is for me, and for everyone else. Furthermore, everyone follows the exact same cycle. It begins with making it to high school, trying to get good grades and have sex, and then continues to college/university where we find what we love most, and with this knowledge, after you get your university degree, get a job to get money to spend on this and that. Then we find a girl whom we fall in love with and eventually get married and have kids. After this point, people don't know what to do next, except try to make it through life. It is such a depressing and demoralizing thought, but it is true, not only for me, not only for you, but for everyone. An... |
| | Posted by Nostalgia at March 12, 2012 |
I know this isn't half as bad as anyone else's, but I got genital warts from this dumb bitch 5 months ago. I WORE A CONDOM TOO!!! How lame is that?! Apparently, you have it for life, but at the same time I've heard that it clears your system in 1-2 years. I'm only 20 years old and I've fucked 20 girls and could very well have fucked 10 more in these past 5 months.
I'm losing touch with all my friends because I see no motivation to go out anymore. I've also turned down really good opportunities and its starting to make me go insane. Everyday I go on the internet hoping someone will tell me that they've had this, gotten through it, and are leading a normal sex life, but I'll I get is the same fucking ambiguous information that leads me in circles.
I want to be happy and I want to move forward in life with confidence, but this really insignificant bullshit is taking a tremendous toll.
Note: If any guys on here have gotten genital warts and no longer deal with them PLEASE SPEAK UP!!!!!!! I need light at the end of the tunnel |
| | Posted by anonymous at March 10, 2012 |
Hello everyone. I don't know where to begin, it's just that somewhere along the line I lost who I was or my motivation. I thought that If i did the right things that I would be happy. Not so true. I am miserable and wake up every morning asking myself how did i get in this situation. I mean don't get it wrong, I have everything I need and more but there is something missing and it feels like I have big ass hole inside of me that really just makes my gut ache every minute of everyday. I am in a one sided relationship where my partner doesn't even really wish to be in but is too proud to admit it. It began with this God foresaken relationship. I really was naive to think that this is what would keep me happy. Well, it sounded good at the time and now I'm so far sunken in I don't even know who I am.
Honestly I love with all my heart and get nothing back. It sux because I literally gave up who I was to be a "we". But f that. I'm so sick of feeling like a pile of dirt or just a headache to the people around me. My family is so caught up in why why why and what are you doing, they are missing the point of me reaching out to them as a family member. I too have a lot of pride and can't get around the fact that I do have no one. No friends, no job, no money, no nothing.
Everything I've done for the past two years has been in vain and that I feel is what is making me so ill. Maybe if someone actually gave a shit about me it wouldn't be so bad. That would be nice for ... |
| | Posted by Joelle12 at March 4, 2012 |
Currently 21. Wake up every morning go to work, sit in a cold grey cubicle for 10 hours straight, go home, cook dinner, clean up from dinner, go to sleep and then do it all over the next day. My live in boyfriend of two years does not pay much attention to me and every day I think more and more of just ending my life. My dad died when I was 14, my mom is a psychopath that mentally and physically abused me for many years. Nothing in my life has turned out the way I wanted. I'm ugly,my weight fluctuates a lot, and more and more my characteristics/mannerisms resemble that of my mother's..which makes me hate myself for being like her. On top of all this I have no friends and some money issues. I feel more alone every day. I love my boyfriend but idk... im just unhappy with myself and my life. I feel lost. |
| | Posted by Alex at March 1, 2012 |
My life is a broken glass. Everything thats mattered to me is just slowly degrading and theres nothing i can do. Theres too much stress in my life to post on here. i try to ignore the stress by working out or looking at the positives of life, but at the end of the day i look at the mirror and see failure. I dont see the point anymore. I mean im a senior in high school and i think about how bad life is gonna be in the future. Im gonna go to college and then work long, hard years to get a meaningless job and if i get a good paying job ill probably get a wife that is a golddigger that doesnt even love me. While time ticks away ill eventually die like most people and not even be remembered. Most people arent remembered greatly except by their family. But i dont even have that... |
| | Posted by anonymous at February 27, 2012 |
Into this twisted months, I plunge without a reason to carry on or a light to follow. But at this point, I swear I'd follow anything. I just need out of here. I fell for a life with a purpose, and at this point, I really don't have any purpose. Nothing in this life has any meaning. I can't find any, or make any. I am dead inside.
And so now I drink. I drink to kill selected memories. I drink for artificial happiness.
I give myself three days to feel better, or I swear I'll drive right off some fucking cliff. If only I knew where one was.
If I can't make myself feel better.. how can I expect anyone else to give a shit?
I'm SCREAMING for some sunlight, or a car to take me anywhere. Just away from this dead and eternal..snow...
I'm dying slowly, but it is happening.
I just need someone to lie to me and tell me that it will be alright. But I know that won't ever happen to my socially retarded ass. Just tell me that'll it be alright. |
| | Posted by stayinglonely at February 26, 2012 |
ok so my life hasnt been overly terrible, i was born in new york and was raised there. growing up it was only my mom and my sister with me. we werent rich or anything and aside from myself none of us knew english well enough. my early life was entirely wake up go to school finish with regular school, and if my sister was not out of school yet go to some after school program until she came to pick me up. she is 5 years older than me so we were never really close in a sense of helping each other out with personal problems (relationships and friends). never got to play with kids my own age, or go to the park or any of the "cool" things kids do....unless it was during lunch time or school trips. always was shy since i didnt know much english and even when i did know enough english i had nothing to say other than the walls in my apartment are white and discuss what i had for dinner. when high school came around it was the same thing except i tried to experiment and decided i didnt want to be shy anymore. my mom was a good influence on knowing who to be friends with so i never got into the wrong crowd, but even when i was with friends i never felt i was actually part of the group. always tried to just stay on what their life dealt with rather than mine because mine was the same as always just watch tv, read and stay at home.i did end of getting a girlfriend in highschool but because of my insecurities i was dumped. i was able to go to college and yet again i attempted to try to... |
| | Posted by sad_jay at February 25, 2012 |
I hate my job, my family, my marriage, and just life it seems. I live everyday hoping it ends instantly so my pain and everyday sorrow will end. My wife dosent care about me and would rather eat and sleep. My family only cares when they want money from me and i dont trust anyone. I havent been happy in over two years and it seems like i will never be happy again. Whats the point again? |
| | Posted by anonymous at February 24, 2012 |
Don't get me Wong I have a great life compared to most on this. I have many friends, a good family, guys interested in me, and good grades. The problem is I don't care. I don't give a fluff about me. I'm just one of the seven billion people on this earth. In a few years, after I die no one will remember me. No one will care about one girl who died, I wouldn't have helped or saved anyone.. I just want to help this earth, not use up it's resources. I want to do memorial things, maybe not that the whole world would know, just one single person would satisfy me. I also really want to help animals. But I really have no way to do these things. I believe life is pointless. It really is.... I hate it.
What should I do? |
| | Posted by anonymous at February 23, 2012 |
I always think about my life. What it is like, what it could be. I don’t really live. Only empty words come out of my mouth. Something like, I will change this and that, I will become like this etc. But I never really do anything. It is really detestable. I am a lazy, ungrateful person. And I think that is the worst kind of person there is. I'm healthy, have a family who loves me, I have some friends, tho I like to be alone more, I'm an introvert. I go to college and I have enough money for a comfortable lifestyle. I take things for granted but I just don't seem to change.
While I read, or watch something, the protagonist always gives 100% in anything he or she does. And if he or she fails, they try again, no matter what, no matter how many times. And so I think to myself, why do I still do nothing. Or rather, why don’t I change something. While knowing that talking about all of this will get me nowhere. And the dissatisfaction that I have with myself, why don’t I change? Why am I still standing still, in the same place, repeating this over and over again. How low should I sink before I actually do something? I guess people like me realise things at the very end.
It is kind of as if I am numb, and a bit nihilistic. Even if I get so low in life, I probably won't change. I am a waste of air and space.
|
| | Posted by too sad for too long at February 23, 2012 |
I am so lonely I have been married for 35 years but my husband cheats on me all the time and denites it , I don't know why I keep believing his lies, I do love him but I am getting to the pointwhere I feel my life is useless |
| | Posted by MelDonB at February 23, 2012 |
Every night I cry myself to sleep at night dreading the morning. Every morning I wake unhappy and empty dreading the day.I feel nauseated and throw up every morning knowing I have to put on a fake fucking smile on my face and go to work pretending everything's hunkey dorey. Every time I drive on a bridge, I picture myself jerking the steering wheel to the right, swerving off into the inviting water below...then, pictures of my kids flash through my mind, and...I can't do it. I can't imagine my actions causing them to feel the way I feel now. Kids, you gotta love 'em, they are the only thing that keep me grounded instead of in the ground. From the moment we are born we are slowly dying, I feel why do it slowly...go for the gold (or should I say go for ground)and just get it the fuck over with. Dying is living, just in another form, in another plain and away from this awful place we call our world. It does not make us weak, it does not make us strong. It simply means we have no point to be here, we have no desire to lead this unwated life full of unanswered questions, doctorines up and down with no real answers, doubting what followers call the truth without any facts to back it up. |
| | Posted by 30's definitely not the best age at February 19, 2012 |
I'm turning 30 saturday, so here comes the appraisal of it all.
I did long studies, trying to become a teacher. Tried, and failed despite my efforts. Rules have changed now, and it's dead for good. 6 years in the trash bin.
Now I work in a nuclear power plant for minimal wages, with neurotic fucks talking about money and how they hate each other the whole day. I work there from 7 to 8, so basically the rest of my live is 3 hours long, before I go to bed for another day.
Got a girlfriend, wich I see like 3 hours a week. We've been together for 8 years now, broke up 3 times already... And it feels like she's failing me again.
Got a band, something really important in my life... But I just don't have the time to involve in it anymore.
I know my life isn't as shitty as some I read here, but I just find no taste in mine. What I loved's gone, and has been replaced with sheer boredom and frustration.
Everyday's a mascarade, but I feel like I'm not going to take this any longer.
Then, things will get worse, I know.
Happy birthday, total failure.
|
| | Posted by sad ass at February 18, 2012 |
I'm 54 years of age. I feel soo old, life is pointless and I don't know when I last felt good. I feel my time is over and I dont know why I'm still here on this planet. I tried to kill myself last Augest by taking a drug overdose, it didnt work even though I took enough drugs to kill a horse. I'm seeing a man who only wants to sleep with me, he does'nt want anymore than that. We meet about once a month for sex. I suppose I should be greatful for that, a least someone wants me. Anyway he is not the problem. I feel alone all the time, like I'm so unwanted unneeded. My two girls are grown up and I hardly see them. |
| | Posted by loserland at February 18, 2012 |
Here I am, 40 yrs old, very few friends, no kids, a soon to be ex-husband who only wanted to marry me for citizenship and admitted that he never loved me.
My parents have always favored my sister and have admitted that to me.
I'm not good looking at all.Every day I think about how I must be a horrible person since no one likes me and no one ever will.
I have a series of fucked up relationships in the past, always been left, even by guys I thought would love me because I was out of their league.
No one seems to like me. People seem to want to be my friend, and when they get to know me, they don't like me anymore. I never get invited to anything and find out a lot of times about parties and things that people specifically didn't want me to attend. I haven't had a best friend in many, many years.
I always end up alone.
I would love to have someone to do things with, but that has never happened.
I do have a job and lots of education, but I don't make much money and wonder why I went through all that school for nothing.
I suffer from Bipolar depression and no medication works for me. There's a lot of things I would like to do but just don't have the energy for. I go to work, come home, web surf, and go to bed. What is the point, really? |
| | Posted by CEE at February 15, 2012 |
Iam 49 live in ohio not working i have ben ill for some time now i have no friends i battel depresion i feel i have no purpose in life ican find no joy in life idont no what to do |
| | Posted by Judy at February 8, 2012 |
My father lives with me. Rent free, free groceries, free cable, free Internet. I feel like I need him to live with me. He fixes things. But lately I've been stressing out about my supporting him. I think it might not be so bad if he cleaned the house more. He always does the dishes, which is nice. The other problem is his loud talking which turns into yelling. I'm so sick of him yelling at me! He yells at me for stupid stuf. I can't handle his temper anymore. I want to tell him he needs to move someplace else. But the thought of that makes me wanna cry. I love him to pieces. But I think the longer we live together, the more bitter I feel towards him. Plus I'm a grown single woman, an scared I'll stay single with him living with me. I feel like he thinks life owes him or something. I know he barely has any money. Yes an my mother worked while he stayed home. Then they divorced. I'm embarassed for him too. My friends hate that I let him live off me. An they hate that he yells at me. I guess it's what happens with any roommate complaints. But since he's living here free, shouldn't he be nicer an cleaner. I know. Not every1 is considerate. It just kills me, my own dad don't see how I'm so riddled with anxiety, because of him. He blames all my friends an my job for the anxiety. I've had butterflies in my stomach since I was 11. Besides me feeling like my dad is a dead beat yelling lazy crazy argumentive old man. That I love! LoL. My job does suck. Every1's probably does. It's ... |
| | Posted by anonymous at January 26, 2012 |
I am not a child I am a 48 year old adult. I have never had one true friend in my entire life. I have had many false friends. I have been teased and picked on pretty much my entire life by family and friends. I have always had low self esteem and I am fairly certain it was due to a shitty childhood. I am not looking for pity I am just venting. I unfortunately have a brain sadly many people think they pick on me and it goes over my head and don't realize I can tell when they are making fun of me, most people really are not smart enough to get away with it, and the dumber they are the more smart they think they are about getting over on people. I have always been used for one thing or another. I was always the good enough when no one else was around kind of person. I have a physical flaw and i am not very attractive. Funny I never knew when I was younger people thought I was too bad they never told me I might have had the confidence to be more outgoing instead of being afraid of never fitting in. I can remember wanting to die as far back as probably 7 years old, I was too young to realize the street I was on had very little traffic so laying in the middle of the street was pretty useless (obviously I was a stupid child) but yes I have always wished I was dead. My mother used the threaten to put me up for adoption all the time and I used to fantasize about what a real family would be like, how would it feel to have someone actually care and not tell you your stupid or th... |
| | Posted by anonymous at January 26, 2012 |
I was the most confident person on the planet. Then 10 years ago my girlfriend had a still birth with what would have been our 1st child. I had to be there for her whilst she was in labour for 9 hours, knowing the baby was not alive. It crushed me. I have a supposidly good job, teaching IT to delinquent children aged 14-16. I now have 2 boys and 1 girl. They are amazing, but I am constantly haunted by the loss of my 1st child. I have lost my mojo. I go to work and come home, same old routine every day. I used to play football 5 times a week. Now, if I play once a week then it is a big deal. No one cares about how the man feels when a child is lost. It's all about the woman. Whilst I appreciate that it was my partner that had the baby, I would of been it's amazing dad. I no longer smoke or drink. I am mr super boring. Lost Lost Lost. |
| | Posted by e at January 22, 2012 |
I have been here for 30 years. I have tried what seems like a world of aspirations. I have been overjoyed and hopeless. I have been enthusiastic and desperate. I have been full of life and totally empty. I'm at the point now where I am not any of these things. My life took a major turing point a few years back and I'm attempting to deal with that. I have traveled, had a variety of partners, truly been in love, had a full belly every day of my life. I live in a country with hot running showers! I am on the cusp of finishing a degree and starting a career for myself, I feel a little old to say that I have not met "the one" and started a family yet, I can't seem to stop talking to my ex (very stupid, i know) and i feel like I've run the gammut of thigs to imporve my situation (be positive, therapy, eat well, exercise, have good relationships, dont sweat the small stuff, moved away from my parents, self-help books, alanon, drowning myself in work, got a pet, ill be volunteering soon, i work with people who are much worse off than myself....) and yet I fee lthis nagging meaninglessness and dissatisfaction. its not dissabling, its not crippiling me publicaly but inside its awful. what else is there? what else am i supposed to try? should i just become accustomed to this state of being? any suggestions appreciated. id really like to move past this stage and onto the next. i know i and all the people on this site have a lot to offer the world, the question is how to get over this hump to do that. |
|
