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If you cried it would be just like my first time
Just get someone to talk to Amy, you need comfort, same as all of us. Talk to us if that is enough, but find some comfort in your loneliness, you are certainly not alone out there and you may mean a lot to someone, now or tomorrow. Life is not that hopeless, is just the emptiness, the loneliness inside that crushes us.
If you were a man, you wouldn't feel guilty- you're buddies would be handing out high fives. Unfortunately, being a woman, there must be something wrong with you... or at least that's what "society" would like to tell you...Sex releases endorphins, perhaps it's that high that you're seeking? Maybe there are deep seeded issues you can't come to terms with and you're acting out? But whatever the case, if you're not happy about these sexual encounters, I would advise seeing a therapist. Addiction can come in many forms...sex is just one of them.
Obviously- I hope you're using a condom? And please, be careful, there are a lot of "wack-oS" on these dating sites. A " casual sexual encounter" can quickly digress into scary, and then it's no longer fun, it's rape.
My heart goes out to you-
Cursed
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