I grew up with my grandparents, every since I was less than one years old. They were the best I could ever ask for. Well in 08 my grandma died and it wreck the family. Grandfather took it gry hard. Married for 53 years. Growing up I did everthing with my grandpa. He was such a smart man. Served 43 years in the airforce. Very great man, invented many things we used every day. This man was not just my grandfather, he was my mentor, I wanted to be like him, smart as him. He was truley my best friend. Well i lost him in November last year. And my life is so different. Not is the same. I have no pride in any my work, no care in the world for anything, rage, sadness, more suicidale thoughts then u could think. Life has went so down hill it is not funny. I have lost a very nice new truck, my race car, everything. To top it off when I moved recently, sombody robbed me of all my tools, racing parts, tools that we antiques that been in my family for years. Lost all my photos beside 2 of them. I have now loss job or more had to quit because the guy stiff me out of 2 weeks my earnings, behind on bills an soon to be on street. When u try to tell ur self every morning u wake up, what is so special about today to keep living.... But now you find no excuses so what. I do know this, I have tried to pray, tried to keep faith, it just is not there. I am tired, just out of energy, I can't keep going. To sit all day nervious, shaking, crying, the stress is well more then I can take. I am just left with noting... I have no friends, no shoulder to cry on, no special someone to spend life with. It is like I am big empty hole. | |
I am so sorry about your grandparents. That is really tough. Have you been to a doctor about depression? I'm not trying to push meds, but sometimes they do help you get over the slump? Being robbed on top of everything else is just like shaking salt in a wound. WTF? In any case, you can't quit now- You're grandparents would want you to fight! And you have a right to be happy just like everyone else- If you can, put the material things that you lost behind you. I know it's going to be really hard, but they are "Just Things". I'm sure that they made you happy, but you can be happy without them-
I can't believe you don't have one friend? Just even one friend that could let you stay at their place until you found work?
Keep focused
Stay strong
We're all rootin for yah!
Cursed
New Comment