LIFE SUCKS

Fuck em but i love her

I have the worst empty feeling. I feel lonely in a room full of people. My bestfriend is probably the one person who can make me smile, i was in love with her. I still am. Ive had feelings for her since the day i met her. Shes gorgeous. But...she dumped me....we never dated but she friendzoned me. So to speak. Who is she madly inlove with now? My super sexy slim rude attitude filled older sister. Now im the younger overweight less pretty one. She proposed to my sister the otherday and i died inside. I get this overwhelming feeling of anger when they touch. I feel like it shouldve been me. But what hurts worse...my bestfriend told me...if we dated, she would cheat on me with my sister. It still burns to know that i wouldnt have been important to her either just like every other female.
We feel exactly the same.. I hurt when shes separated from us. She feels the same when shes separated from us (me and my sister). I feel like shes supposed to be in my life forever id die if anything happens to her.
I wish she would sit down and listen but everytime im around her, its like im invisible and she doesnt see me.
Nobody sees me.
Im just...invisible.
But i care too much. Id cross the world for these people. But whenever im feeling down and out and crying...nobody stops to ask whats wrong.
& if they do they just wanna be nosey.
Im more than depressed. Im submerged in my emotions and feelings of doubt & anger. Like i dnt care about myself at all. & im hurt oh so deeply whenever i see nobody cares. I want to be loved. I wanna be accepted i wanna be needed for more than just sex and favors like go get me this or goget me that. I want someone to need me at night cuz they cant sleep without me.
They need to hear my voice so they know im ok.
I can never find a girl who truly needs me & means it. Ive kissed wayy too many frogs...way too many asses and done way too much to be unappreciated the way that i am....