LIFE SUCKS

Family frustration and depression

Hi I am 50 yrs old Indian woman, married to an European, got divorce and returned to my parents in India. I have no kid, no social life, no froend, np vacation, as all these are sociL taboos here. My parents (my father is extremely ill heart patient) mother a retd. prof now complaining whole day about my failure and how I have made their life miserable with social stigma of divorce, no children etc. By the way I am the only child of them so expectation was high and I perhaps fould n9t fulfil all. My father runs tbe house in his rule and he speaks the last word, whjch kn 90% cases are abusive to me, he recalls all my weawhom kness and failures everydag and proves I am worthless. He is the one stops me from socialising with anyone or group. The point is as he is very ill I cannotgoo boring
thanks
Joba not argue with him. Once I tried gently then he slapped ne and threw furnitures at me. After a while he wax feeling sick and ofcourse I was responsible.
In india it is so different, you can hardly live as a single woman, with no job on top of this. This job is funny I was forced to wotk in his company on projects, no onehasthe skill to cope with new demands, entire burden onme and when they finallylisttheproject it was 100/% myfault.
Idonotlookfirward to live,as there is no good thing waiting for me in future. I am now very deppressive and take high anti depressive. My parents 24 hours blameme tobedepressuve and saudotgersof my age arenot, soitis either my trick or fault. I would live to say good bye to all some day only do not know when, how and to whom.I only know my parents thats all and they said I am not attemted so far as I was a coward. At 50 yrs, no job,no marriage, no cheerfulfamily, no socialnetwork friends, abysive parents, i feel living at their mercy, feel fully captive and feel worthlessy. Internet atleast helps me to share and then I feell ittle better. Thanks for readyong, badly need advi es. Pl HELP
Hope tbis is