LIFE SUCKS

This life makes me sick!

I am an 18 year old and am tired of putting up with the crap in this world. Everywhere I go people are doing drugs and being irresponsible. There is nobody to relate to because everybody thinks im wierd because of my values. I am a christian and it is nearly impossible this day and age to find a girl who holds my same moral values and standards. almost every girl I know has already lost their virginity and does drugs. the few that are left are either not christians or they are not attractive at all! I want a relationship with somebody who cares about me and I can share my life with. At tjis moment my life feels hopeless and I am starting to face the reality that I might end up forever alone.

I have lost all hope and am still suffering to this day from a broken heart. If there was ever a perfect person for everybody this on girl was it. She was beautiful, caring, and was everything I could ever want out of a girl. Her family liked me and she was the first and only person who I actually loved. I remember we could talk for hours and hours and still never run out of things to say. Then it happened.... I went to the county fair with her like we always did and this random guy came up and started talking to her and then he kissed her on the cheek! I asked her what was going on and she hesitated to tell me that she likes this other guy better and ran off with him. Later I find out that she met the guy 3 days ago!!!!!! I was so upset that I couldnt eat for a week and cried untill I had no more tears left.

Since that day no matter what i do I cant get her out of my mind. What makes it worse is every time I meet a girl I cant look at her normally because I will always be comparing her to my heartbreaker. And every time I hear her name it is like pouring salt in a wound. This is one scar that will never heal

The older I get the more I find that society gets worse and worse. I have faith that God will show me the perfect girl eventually but im not getting any younger. I just feel like an outcast here because everything people do is against my morals that I hold myself by. And I am always told that I am no fun just because I wont go to parties and drink alcohol or do drugs.

I am just done with feeling like crap all the time. My only hope is to become a police officer so that I can have a life that means something, and be around people who I know have good morals while punishing those who are currupting this society as it is. This one dream and God are the only things that allow me to keep hope. Ive been alone for too long and I just cant face the fact that there is nobody out there who is right for me