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Bitter and cofused person

Posted by anonymous at March 4, 2012
Tags: Attitude  2012 March  Philosophical

I'm 20 years old.Female.I am a lazy person and maybe because of that laziness I get myself confused. I don't know what the "right" things are. When choosing or when making a decision or even doing something I always don't believe I made the right choice. I feel like I am always failing in whatever I do. I have a family which cares for me. And have a comfortable enough life. But I still don't study and don't have motivation. I don't know about my friends. Before I thought people were not bad or they weren't doing things because of greed or such. I never seemed to get angry or disappointed or betrayed. But as time went by people were getting more and more evil and I think they now do things because they need something and not really because they like someone. But everybody is so selfish. Is it really like that? Are people like that? Even the ones I love? Why did this have to happen? Why did my perception change? Did I just start(I mean a couple of years) seeing the world how it really is? Is this reality? When did I become so bitter and just depressed? Why do I always seem to fail? Am I being paranoid? Why am I like this? Why can't I be grateful to a point where it's enough to have people to talk to and to have a roof over my head and food? Why do I do the things I do. I feel really bad. I don't want to disappoint everyone. If only I was different. Please give me advice on what to do. I can't talk to anybody they won't listen and the others have much more important things to worry about than my selfishness. And no money for professional help. When did I become so bitter...

Votes:

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Comments:
By nyo at 09,Mar,12 12:10

I'm such a lazy female too, mostly in my academic life. I'm quite successful in school, but I actually don't know what to do, what I want after school. I don't have dreams or ambition. Do you have a dream/ambition?
I have a comfortable life too, my friends & family always love me. But, I'm quite ashamed of my life as I don't really care about my life. But, as you know, sweetheart, life is getting harder, and the people are getting bitter. We have to fight, yet we are demotivated, the fire in our heart is gone and people of course won't wait for losers.
We might have been living in heaven for a long time, and when we need to go to the earth, we just don't want to let the heaven go.
But I think what we need is a little hardwork, my friend. I didn't see that word in your story (and of course my story). You still have a chance to work hard now as we are still quite young.
Failure, selfishness, change of mind and depression are really something humane. It really colors your life. Imagine yourself if you're successful someday, you'll realize that the up and down of life is really enjoyable. Seek something (hobby, music?) to escape from these temporary pain.
Stop thinking that you're disappointing everyone, change the orientation to satisfy yourself first.
It's good to have you seeking the advice from other people. It means you are willing to go forward.
I'm also struggling now. So wish us luck! Keep the hard work!
By anonymous at 10,Mar,12 00:04

Well I have a dream, but at the same time, I'm just uncertain about failing. I'm scared. A bit too self aware I guess. Everyone who has ever succeeded didn't question themselves and were strong. It's about having a strong will. So thank you, I know I...we, are not alone. It really means a lot. So good luck to you too!


By anonymous at 09,Mar,12 13:05

You can't seem to be happy for one reason bec you're an effin bludger. Seriously, i'm not trying to be judgemental but that's what i can figure out with your story. Try to get some fun outdoors or do the things that interest you the most. Don't just sit around as if life is just bout givin in to laziness and asking plenty of 'whys'. Find the clues for your questions, and leave the others as they're not meant to be answered.
Goodluck.
By anonymous at 10,Mar,12 00:06

Nah, you're right. It's like a reality check. I know what I have to do. And if I don't, I'll hit rock bottom and change it than. The world doesn't need losers. So hopefully I'll change before that. Thank you.


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