Im Bex from Minnesota. & heres just a TINY speck of my shitpile called Life...
Lost my father 9mos ago & had to sit in the ICU every single day as he got sicker & sicker until i got the call at 3a.m that he had passed. sine then my opiate addiction has spiraled out of control. i take pills all day~everyday & no longer care about time between or wtf im mixing really. ONE month ago i started shooting up. im already full of scars & ALL i can think about is my father looking down on me with sadness. i confessed this also to my disabled mother whom i care for full time. its bad enough that SHE cares for ME when my withdrawals are SO fucking bad i cant even MOVE. Two months before my dad died..my Gpa died also. last may my friend vinny overdosed. my cousin was diagnosed with hiv. ive lost 3 more friends due to overdoses, suicide & murder. also lost my gma a few years ago. death has surrounded me ALOT the past couple of years. my depression is SO bad that i FEAR the next day when this day hasnt even fully started. im so afraid of being sick that it causes insomnia from all the anxiety i have. listen to me when i say this PLEASE: im NOT here to whine. im here to hopefully give someone hope & make people understand that even though life DOES indeed suck..someone else always has it worse than you AND me. some of the shit ive read here brought me to tears. hopefully i can use this site as a form of diary..& that someone will respond. im glad i stumbled upon this site. its cool theres things like this around for people like us that may feel they have no outlet for their emotions. cuz writing/typing DOES help. ALOT. thanks to whoever may have read this...your stories gave me some hope & i hope some of mine can maybe even do the same.
much love...Bex from Minnesota xx | |
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and the sad ugly truth is that humans really don't have a purpose, other than to occupy the earth. So why wouldn't death be a better place, right?
well, I'm gonna wait this life out, cause its gonna be short, and there are some things that bring a smile to my face as much as things bring tears to my eyes.
i mean yeah well , parents dies, kinda sucks, but as long as you have alot of $$ , who fucking cares,seriously, call some stripers, have an awesome orgy. ( i am being completely serious )
your too old to cry abt death of your damn parents. About grandparents death, well old people suck anyways, its good they died. FUck yeah homeboi!
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