To describe myself a little bit I'm a teenage white girl with blue eyes, dirty blonde medium length hair, a height of 5'7, and I'm over weight.
My life is a complete pathetic hell hole. Don't get me wrong, I have good grades (mostly A student) and my family is (mostly) amazing... it's me that's the problem. My parents divorced when I was a little baby and I've been through a lot of trauma from it. My mother remarried when I was 4 or 5 and has been with him ever since. They had my little brother when I was 9... don't get me wrong, I love him to death but being an only child for 9 years and then suddenly getting no attention at all was kind of difficult for me. We fight all the time too... we both take tae kwon do and he thinks that he can use it on me whenever he gets mad... do he hits and kicks, and basically, does anything and everything he can to push my buttons and drive me insane. I swear, he was sent to this earth by Satan himself to punish me for a crime I do not know that I've done... it must have been pretty awful... okay, okay. He's only six so he's not all that bad but still.
Moving on, my parents say that I can talk to them about anything... anything?!? yeah right! Only if it pleases them. My mother tells asks me to tell he what's bothering me and when I'm half way through, she tells me to shut up! WTF?!?!?!?
I've never had a boyfriend and I get made fun of all the time for it.
I have no social life because I'm too busy.
My whole house is a total mess!
My best friend moved to Alberta.
I prefer to be by myself (I'm very solitary) because I'm afraid that I'll say the wrong thing and people will think I'm stupid. And because then there is no one to talk to me and I can be by myself and have space to breathe.
There really isn't anything too too major that says "my life sucks" I just really am hating life and think that the world wouldn't care if I just dissapeared. I want to die. What is wrong with me?!?!?!?!?!? | |
Being a child of divorce is one of the worst psychological things parents can do to a child. Though I'm not one, I've seen many who are and I'll gladly speak for them when I say it sucks. Though there's not much you can do there, somethings you just have to accept.
The fight for attention will always go on between siblings, he's the youngest therefore he should be getting the most attention, at first because he was an infant then a small child, you've got to keep a close eye on them plus your step parent naturally will cling to them more than you, like I said above being a child of divorce suck, and one parent getting remarried is usually a big part of the sucky part. You shouldn't worry though, give it a couple of years it'll something that everyone will grow out of.
You shouldn't talk to your parents about really personal stuff. Now if you have this mole that's looking like cancer or something, misshapen and discolored and all of that, that's something you bring to their attention. But somethings are meant for you and your peers, or just you and possibly a close friend if you know what I mean.
There's always time for a social life. I work part time, go to school full time I still have friends and go out to eat, watch movies, parties and just generally hangout. I'd say stay to a tight knit group of really close friends, don't get a whole bunch of acquaintances and call it good you know? I've gone through a lot of "friends" though the past six years but now I've invested a lot of time with two really close friends and now I think I'm set for life, I really could care less about everyone else and what they want to do.
Umm clean your house? Take it upon yourself to get stuff done, nobody gives chances you've got to take them. Learn to let loose a little, being solitary means you're stationary. You said you're overweight well looky there we have a correlation. Go to the gym, everyone will actually think good of you wanting to get in shape, who knows you might run into your new best friend. Plus you'll forget all about who you used to be and be a happier, healthier, friendlier person.
By the way the world wouldn't care if you disappeared, people would.
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