For my 18th birthday I was burying a man that was like my second father in the ground due t him killing himself and never understood why. Couple years later I get a call from my uncle and knew something was wrong but no one believed me. I told my family that he was going to hurt himself but still no one believed me and he lived 600 miles awat. Couple days later he put a pistol to his head and killed himself. The feeling I have everyday is horrible and it eats away at your soul. I cry myself to sleep almost everynight. Then the day of my graduating from college I find out that my grandfather who I was extremely close to dies the night before. I just feel like god hates me and doesn't want me to be happy but I still praise his name. I just want to be happy again. I have not felt happy in five years. Why does god like to see my suffer? |
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