I'm writing this b/c im very stuck and unsure what to do. I feel the simple act of writing this down will help motivate change in my life. My situation sucks right now. I am horribly anxious all the time and i no longer sleep normal hours. I seem to be suffering from some kind of tremor that makes my hands shake uncontrollably when i get nervous and the dexterity in my fingers is so bad now that i find it hard to do normal things sometimes. Worse yet is the fact that doctors can't seem to do anything for me as nothing is descernibly wrong.
Anyway, im 23 years old and i graduated from college as of 5 months ago. However ever since moving back home i have found it impossible to start my life. I am broke and i feel in many ways underprepared for finding work in my field. I don't feel i learned much at school and now realize how difficult it will be to compete with other more qualified folks. My resume sucks, i was a bit of a reclose in school so i don't have recommendations, and if i even were to stumble upon a position im sure the fact that im illequiped for the work would be realized relatively quickly. I don't look forward to working as im fearful of everything and i recently found out that i need surgery to fix a busted shoulder from an incident that happened 3 years ago. Not sure what to do outside of fixing my shitty shoulder and resume. Im wondering if there are any good ideas out there for easy subsistence jobs which could be applied for out of state and at the very least keep me independent from my parents while i move forward my plans? Every day is worse than the last and i feel like im wasting time and can't stop.
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Also, take baby steps if you are petrified of life outside of college - you are not the only one who feels that way. you'll find that each step you take, no matter how small will add to your confidence and experience level. You will look back at that step below and think to yourself that it wasn't quite as horrible as you imaged it would be. Remember that every one you encounter is a person, who has to shower, sit on the pot, and brush their teeth - just like you - so, don't let them intimidate you. Never forget though that some people are just plain assholes, adn there's nothing you can generally do about them - just try to avoid assholes as much as possible.
Otherwise, get out there and take a chance - you will be glad you did.
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