LIFE SUCKS

when will it end...

I was fairly optimystic before 2008. That was until bankruptcy, foreclosure and divorce all in the span of 2 months. Feel free to judge all you want... Even though I had a 740 fico score prior with not one late payment beofore 2008. I also had a huge pool home, a couple nice cars, and people to clean the house and do the lawns. But Yes, I am now a mere deadbeat who bankrupted his bills and could no longer support his children.

The ex-wife was fine. Her dad gave her a place to live and a job. She also got $700 from me every month and $2200 from the state.

The worst part was moving in with my mother and losing the kids to an ex-wife who met a guy 4 states away and moved my children out there.

I went from seeing my children every other weekend and driving 3 hours round trip a week night just to seeing them for dinner.. To never seeing them. She will rarely let me talk to them and she loves keeping them away from me. It's been 6 months, but my 4 and 5 year olds still cry at how much they miss me everytime I get to talk to them.

I always condsidered myself a good guy. Would never intentionally harm nobody and am empathetic against anyone less fortunate or not in a great situation. I have always given freely of my time and money and have helped out whereever I could.

Yet I am cursed until the day I die. People seem to only truly despise me or want to take whatever they can from me. I havent had a real friend in over 20 years. I have lived a life of depression and have never been able to find happiness. I am now stuck at my mothers house for the past 2 1/2 years... in my late 30's and barley make enough money to live here.

I dont even think I am mentally or financially stable enough to live on my own anymore.

I dont know what ever I did to deserve this life God. But I do wish for another one or a quick end to this one.