My life, like the rest of the people's on here, sucks. I'm currently living with my drunk of a father because I don't have a job and can't afford to live on my own. (Which I have never been). I was a loner at school and never had friends. I was always picked on -- first verbally, but as I got older, this became physical, so when I was in middle school I was suspended once every two weeks because I was in another fight. (I'll never forget the first one I was in. Really kicked my ass). Ended up in a mental hospital called Tenbrooke when I was twelve for having suicidal thoughts because of my low-to-non-existant self esteem, anxiety, and depression. When I was in the eighth grade I moved in with my father, which really fucked up our relationship from that point on. I absolutely hated it here. The only thing that made me stay was the hope of actually getting a "girlfriend." (I use quotations because I'm the romantic type and thought that it was "love at first sight" and blah blah blah.) The only thing is is that girl I liked didn't even acknowledge my existance... No, I take that back. I think I once heared her say "I hate him so much" after I made a fool of myself. (Something I did cnstantly). Well, tentions with my father finally broke and I went back to my mothers. Well, after six years I'm here again. The girl I liked (and never got over) currently works at the local market. I don't think she remembers me, which is probably a good thing. My anxiety and depression have increased, while my self esteem has withered away. I think about suicide constantly now, though I don't think I'll ever do it. I long ago realized the futility of trying to change anything. Oh well. Still not as bad as some of the other stories I've read on this site.