This is the story of why my life sucks. Please understand that I realize that my life could be so much worse and I know that there are people in this world who are going through things much worse than I am. This is pretty much just a way for me to vent my feelings right now.
I found out in October that I was pregnant. I have been wanting to be a mom for a very long time. It wasn't a planned pregnancy, but we ( my b/f and I) were very excited. We were hoping for a little boy.
A week ago, I started to have some complications that threatened the pregnancy so I had an early ultrasound done. I was supposed to be 9 weeks pregnant but the measurements on the u/s showed only 6 weeks. Also it showed that I had been pregnant with twins but lost one of them. This was hard to deal with, but I felt better knowing that one baby was still alive and had a heartbeat.
Along came Thanksgiving... probably a day that will be hard to enjoy for a few years. I started to miscarry the other fetus in the morning. I knew it was happening. I was in denial. I bled for 4 days before I went to get an ultrasound. On the screen where a heartbeat used to be, there was no more. The next day I had a D&C.
Now all I seem to think about is loosing my two children and everywhere I go I see pregnant women and babies and it makes me so sad. I cry myself to sleep every night. Nothing that people say helps because they havn't been where I am right now. So... yea... my life sucks and its not fair and that's about it.