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Posted by WDC at October 26, 2010
Tags: Addictions  Attitude  Loneliness  2010 October  Relationship

My life's not the worst here...but it still sucks.

I am alone...that's probably my #1 problem. I have always been alone. I'm 40. I have a supportive family, but I have been on my own since 16. Now at 40...that's 24 years of living alone.

I cannot get a girlfriend to save my life (let-a-lone a wife) and I have no kids (sort of takes the former to have the latter).

I get blown off by women virtually every week (sometimes 2/3 times a week). I keep swinging the bat...but I'm much better at striking out than I am at hitting home runs.

I do have friends...but they seem to have more of a it's sort of hard to keep up because I don't want to interfere too much with others who have other priorities.

Sometimes I have suicidal thoughts....or angry thoughts. Sometimes I imagine yelling at women that I've had a date or two with in the past. Once I was imagining this while driving and I hit another car. It was my fault, I was in a different world. Fortunately, no one was hurt and I just had to make an insurance claim.

I also am a chronic masterbater. Funny, I didn't think 40 year old men were suppose to be able to have an erection 5-10 times a day. Maybe it's a gift or maybe it's a mental disorder. Obviously I've become addicted to Internet porn, that almost goes without saying given my situation.

If you are going to comment, please don't write something stupid like god/jesus/etc. I am 99.999999999999999999% sure that there is no god, but I am 100% sure that any of the religions practiced are complete bs and made for people more pathetic than me.


New Comment

By anonymous at 26,Oct,10 22:03

Wow, you should move to South East Asia, like Thailand, Cambodia, Vietnam, or maybe even the Philippines. If you're white, you will get more puss* than you can imagine. It doesn't matter if you're ugly. If you can fly there, you can teach English there to support yourself.
By anonymous at 26,Oct,10 22:31

thats true
By anonymous at 26,Oct,10 22:32

or even a russian bride mail bride if ur not into asians

By anonymous at 27,Oct,10 06:10

I don't know... Maybe you could first get some help, work on your self confidence and self-esteem, then, thrust me, that would be easier.
By anonymous at 01,Nov,10 22:27

Get some help and then thrust you? Sounds great.
By anonymous at 19,Nov,10 05:38


By anonymous at 27,Oct,10 21:29

God does indeed exist, but "God" is a concept far out reaching any anthropomorphic idea a human can come up with. It (God) is a reality that is not bound up in the squanderings of petty, earth-bound religions. God is not Christian. God is not Islamic. God is not Hindu. God is not Jesus. God is not Mohammad. God is none of these, for God is all of it and infinitely more. God is God. God is Satan. God is the millionare who loves his/her life. God is the homeless vagrant on the street who gets spit on daily. God is me. God is you.
By anonymous at 28,Oct,10 19:18

You could not be more wrong. Of course there is a God. Life (living cells) are made of information and the only known source of information is a higher level of information. But a creator is always outside of their creation. God can no more be a part of the universe than a painter is part of their painting. The painting reveals the painter but is not the actual painter in part or in whole. I used to believe there is no God but anyone who honestly seeks the truth will discover it.

By anonymous at 28,Oct,10 10:44

Yeah, you and about 9 million other people. Quit your bitchin, stop hitting on women out of your league, put a profile on a free dating website like Plentyoffish and go after some women that might actually go for you so you can quit whackin off to porn so much, it's pathetic.
By anonymous at 19,Nov,10 05:39

True, everyman I've slept with who is a porn addict treats sex like a porn film, and my God is it bad! Sloppy kisses, trying to put fingers where they don't go, it's just not cool at all.
By anonymous at 20,Nov,10 07:39

porn=no imagination

By anonymous at 29,Oct,10 01:27

Okay you need to understand one thing....I'm not a religious person.religious people don't have order.BUT....the lord of lords the God that created heaven and earth is real,in the Bible it talks about men like u,instead of playing with ur goods why don't you read it and ask for a understanding ,just try it he promised u so much and you don't even have faith in your self so I can understand why u don't believe in the most high GOD.Don't u never give up on God cause he want give up on u.Stop living for self...that's why u are so alone

By anonymous at 29,Oct,10 01:31

And by the way I am a full believer and I am reading your story my life is amazing

By anonymous at 29,Oct,10 01:56

And for the person that said God is the Satan,what?your God might be but the one true God that is God of all gods is the only Creator

By anonymous at 29,Oct,10 19:55

I totally get you even though I am not a guy. My soon to be x husband masterbats all the time. He stopped having sex with me and now I master bat all the time now since I don't get sex. I hope one day you find a woman that will treat you right. Also if you do find a lady I would wait to tell her how often you masterbat. At first I didn't believe my husband and was actually very turned off by it. Then I came around it is just to bad that he no longer wants to share his life with me.

By anonymous at 29,Oct,10 19:58

I want to meet you I just posted that last post about my husband masterbatting. Any ways I am %100 sure that there is no GOD. I have never met anyone that thinks that way I do. That is great. That also may be a reason for no finding many woman. I know everyone thinks I am the devils span or something and they don't really want anything to do with me. I think it is great.
By anonymous at 01,Nov,10 12:09

You are 100% wrong about there being no God and you should learn how to spell masturbate.

By anonymous at 30,Oct,10 00:15

DUDE! Hey, you need to get laid. From now on, that is your number one priority. Look up David De Angelo and the Gunwitch method and read "The Game" by Neil Strauss. This will do wonders for you. I promise that getting accepted by women and learning to interact with other people will cure you depression and porn addiction.---- Honestly, getting laid doesn't existentially help, but learning how to become more social and confident with other people will make you happier. When you get into this stuff, watch out for marketing scams. You can trust the guys I mentioned though. Learn how to flirt with women and while your at it, become swol! Train for a local sprint triathlon or 5k. Good luck!

By anonymous at 10,Nov,10 11:41

You'll know theres a god when you see his wrath poured on you

By anonymous at 11,Nov,10 18:33

Take a flight to Bankok Thailand.

By anonymous at 12,Feb,11 13:16

Yeah, your life sucks. I can relate. I went 3 years without getting laid. That was when I was 25,27,28. Everytime someone at work would use the word girlfreind or wife I would tense up. And by tense up I mean I wouldn't be able to concentrate on my work, get real nervous, and feel myself starting to sweat. Anyway, I bought a book called "the game" ny neil struass and it helped me out. After reading that book i took a couple of courses on how to meet women and started to go out with people i meet through that were in the same situation i was in. The next year i got my first girlfreind. It didn't work out and the next year after that i slept with more women in that year that most men sleep with in a lifetime. (accourding to that number is 7) Good luck buddy

By anonymous at 02,Mar,11 07:04

Im so glad you dont have kids. My dad was a dirty perv like you and it affected me and my siblings horribly. Get some fucking help Man. It's just gross.

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