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nothing to look forward to.

Posted by anonymous at October 16, 2010
Tags: Family  Meaninglessness  2010 October

So, I don't have these horrible stories of a suck life that involve flunking out of school, or drugs, or failed relationships. The whole reason my life sucks is because I have nothing. Nothing at all. I have not one thing to look forward to. I wake up in the morning, with no reason to get out of bed. I'm a 22 year old with so many restrictions in life it would make the average person vomit, but because I'm so finically tied to my parents, I have no way of leaving. And if i try to leave, its been made clear that I will never be allowed to see any of my sibling ever again. So I wake up, go to class, sit in the library alone, doing nothing but study. I have friends yes, but they are all busy living lives of freedom, going where they want, doing what they want, in the way the want. i can't even listen to music or watch the movies of my choice without hiding it. the one person in the whole world that I woke up for left, and won't return my calls or messages. my parents are fighting constantly, and putting me in the middle. I have nothing but the drama of others, with no life of my own. At least before when I had someone, there was a point to it all. but whats the point of anything if you don't have someone to share it with. what do i do? I'm stuck.


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Comments:
By anonymous at 19,Oct,10 23:14

Oh my God. Im so sorry. I understand, I really do. But man just pull through it, because when you get older no one really cares about your sexuality. So just hang in there. Good luck.


By anonymous at 20,Oct,10 01:38

Hey anonymous,
There are probably millions of people of all ages who can relate to what you are saying. Just an emptiness, and feeling alone in this damn world. Everyone else is going about their business oblivious to our inner torment. Yes, things could always be worse and I should be thankful for the many blessings I have. But still I feel like an outcast on an island disconnected from civilization.
The only thing that seems to give me some sort of validation is reaching out to other souls. I want you to know you are not alone in this fire of life. Come by as my guest to www.lifebyphil.com. Hope to chat sometime.
Phil


By anonymous at 22,Oct,10 11:30

I understand what you are feeling because of what I going through right now. I am 22 and I have parents that are doing well but do not care about me or my sibilings. My mother only pays my fees and i care for myself. They are so protective but greedy, stingy and wicked. I have never had a boyfriend that I call my own, envy other girls at college and wish my life could be better and I have nothing special in me. I have prayed and fasted but nothing has happened yet and I almost 23.


By anonymous at 24,Oct,10 22:03

that is exactly how my life is. i wake up to my single dad pulling me out of bed, walk 5 1/2 miles to school, come home, do homework, and go back to sleep, only to do it all again tomorrow. i have no friends or money. if i kill myself, ill have to stay forever between life and death. not sure if that would even be as bad as my life now. hope you arent as tortured as me.


By anonymous at 30,Oct,10 00:39

Hey, I know exactly what you can do to make all of your problems go away.... push-ups! Get fucking swol so that when you get out of your rut, you can get all of the ladies. Do workouts like Crossfit.com, so you have some new workout to look forward to every day. The endorphin rush and twenty-ish minutes of training will add some variety to you life and get you in kick-ass shape. Peace.


By anonymous at 11,Mar,11 20:18

So, join the military if you live in the United States. That will get you away from controlling parents and give you a higher purpose!!


By Makailah at 24,May,16 19:36

The question I would like to ask is this: given that change is inevitable and the U.S. hegemony will be challenged will we be able to go through this change without more bloodshed ?? Or is military cottnorfanion inevitable? Chiefly because of the U.S. political mindset.


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